Ricky Gervais Quotes

If I do eat meat, it's got to be ethical. I want to know that it lived a great life before it was killed humanely.

Americans are brought up to believe they can grow up to be the president of the United States. Brits are told, It won't happen to you.

Try something. And never be afraid to fail. That failure is useful too. It's just another building block.

Where there's a will - there's a relative!

You try to make characters you care about, and I think realism helps. Even though this is a high concept, the characters have got to be real.

We shouldn't even need the word 'atheism'. If people didn't invent ridiculous imaginary gods, rational people wouldn't have to deny them.

Whether you understand they evolved over billions of years or believe that a God made them all one afternoon, please be kind to animals.

Same sex marriage isn't gay privilege, it's equal rights. Privilege would be something like gay people not paying taxes. Like churches don't.

Avoid employing unlucky people - throw half of the pile of CVs in the bin without reading them.

I've never been insulted by hateful satanists for not believing in their devil. Only by loving Christians for not believing in their God.

Atheism is the lack of belief in a god (or gods). It makes no claim. It merely rejects the claim that a god (or gods) exists. Nothing more.

Some [people] are really smart. You know who you are. Some [people] are really thick. Unfortunately, you don't know who you are.

I'm not from around these parts. I'm from a little place called England: we used to run the world before you.

She said, 'I'm your biggest fan,' and I said, 'Who are you?' She said, 'Paris Hilton.'

That's the amazing thing about life. You can just rub it out, like a blackboard, and start again.

Most people sitting at home aren't cool, successful, witty Hollywood stars, but they all worry about what people think of them when they faux pas.

I never had a plan. I just sort of ambled along, doing exactly what I wanted every day of my life.

No one wants to see cool people doing brilliantly. I want to see the struggle. That's the fun bit.

I think sometimes you get given a good pile of goodwill, and it's whether you use it up in the first six months or spread it out over a career.

I see myself much more as a writer/director or at least an aspiring writer/director - not necessarily in film.

You are the result of billions of years of evolution. You will only live for a few years and will never exist again. Absolutely beautiful

Just because you're offended, doesn't mean you're right.

I don't see myself as part of an acting fraternity or a comedy fraternity.

A Christian telling an atheist they're going to hell is as scary as a child telling an adult they're not getting any presents from Santa.

I'm a militant fundamentalist atheist. I'm going to get on a crowded train, unbutton my coat and say rational things. People will be hurt.

Animals are not here for us to do as we please with. We are not their superiors, we are their equals. We are their family. Be kind to them.

I'm not a person that's easily embarrassed, but I'm embarrassed for other people.

A world without any lies at all is not a good world, because it's artless and because there are no white lies, no flattery.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but if you believe in god, you're wrong.

Being on the edge isn't as safe, but the view is better

I've never done anything for the common consensus. I do things to please me. If you are happy with something yourself, you become bulletproof.

If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.

That's the other thing I learned that day, that the truth, however shocking or uncomfortable, in the end leads to liberation and dignity.

Enjoy life. Have fun. Be kind. Have worth. Have friends. Be honest. Laugh. Die with dignity. Make the most of it. It's all we've got.

I think that's the fundamental thing - you can go anywhere you like as long as you're following a character that the audience likes and understands.

Atheism is a belief system",
is like saying "not going skiing, is a hobby.

Body language is more powerful than words.

If there is a God, why did he make me an atheist?

To complain about critics in a business is like a sailor complaining about the waves. Go back to the beach if you don't like it.

With 'The Office' and 'Extras' I've always snuck in a little bit of heart and pathos - and drama, which is fun.

Celebrities, make it harder for hackers to get nude pics of you from your computer by not putting nude pics of yourself on the computer.

Look, just tell me where that lemon came from and I'll shut up and go away.

It's a privilege to be in such a great category of people and ... I don't believe in God, so I'd like to thank dogs. Dogs have given me everything.

Of all the disciplines involved in making anything - TV, film or anything I do - the writing is the most valuable commodity.

I love how people walk around with crucifixes, skullcaps, pointy hats, funny beards and then say 'you should keep your atheism to yourself.'

I don't do anything for the money.

Wearing cosmetics that were tested on animals makes you ugly on the inside

You see reality TV and it's not reality TV. It's contrived and everything is plotted and scripted nearly. Documentaries are the same and just as bad.

I think Hollywood's gotten more reactionary and conservative over the years, because there's no longer art in Hollywood. Art suffers in Hollywood.

What will it feel like after you die? Exactly the same as it felt for those billions of years before you were born.

Comedy is a medicine - a healing process that can help people get through difficult times and understand things better

I went to university with no money. I can't understand a society that wouldn't give a poor person the same opportunity as a rich person.

My philosophy? Have a laugh for as long as you can and don't get run over. Or stabbed.

People have let me down in the past. I've loved something, and it's become a disgrace. I'd rather start again.

My physique is down to 20 years of eating cheese.

I know how much embarrassment hurts, and I love it as a theme because you can keep digging a hole. It's just an endless well, embarrassment.

I've got the attention span of a child.

I see Atheists are fighting and killing each other again, over who doesn't believe in any God the most. Oh, no..wait.. that never happens.

Know your limitations and be content with them. Too much ambition results in promotion to a job you can't do.

You do your own thing and you see if you survive.

I always chose all my friends on whether they were funny. What's a better way to pass the time than laughing or smiling?

People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they're very rarely the same.

Take a picture not a trophy This is how real men shoot animals

Do this or you'll burn in hell.

Famous people are above the law,

You now have the least amount of time you've ever had, to do everything you've ever wanted to do. Enjoy your life. You only get one

I think comedy has to be an intellectual pursuit. It comes down to logic and analysis. As soon as it becomes emotional, it's not comedy anymore.

Since there is absolutely no logical reason to assume there is an afterlife, I decided to make the life I have now as much fun as possible.

Remember, if you don't sin, then Jesus died for nothing

Spirituality really lost its way when it became a stick to beat people with: 'Do this or you'll burn in hell.

The best advice I've ever received is, 'No one else knows what they're doing either.

It will be great to play a short, fat sweaty loser for a change.

I'd like to thank God for making me an atheist.

If you're surrounded by idiots, you're the unpopular one and the odd one out because idiots don't like smart asses.

Never confuse your right to say what you believe with a right to never be disagreed with and ridiculed for saying what you believe.

Whatever else is happening, things are better in the sun.

You have to be 100% behind someone, before you can stab them in the back.

Got a proper job at 28. Gave it up to try comedy at 38. Decided to get fit and healthy at 48. It's never too late. But do it now

There's a difference between a job and a career - if you're the boss you don't stop at six o'clock, you have to worry about everything all the time.

I'm a failed pop star. I always sneak a song into everything I do.

It's a strange myth that atheists have nothing to live for. It's the opposite. We have nothing to die for. We have everything to live for.

Blasphemy: a law to protect an all-powerful, supernatural deity from getting its feelings hurt.

I think the best advice I'd say to any actor when you do comedy is play it straight.

I don't believe in about 2700 Gods. Christians don't believe in 2699 Gods. They're nearly as atheistic as me.

The simple fact is, offense is taken, not given,

America champions the underdog. We champion the underdog until he's not the underdog anymore, and he annoys us.

Mondays are fine. It's your life that sucks.

I never think of myself as a celebrity - or even an actor, actually. I think of myself as a writer-director.

I think everyone has the ability to be loved.

The only reason I work out is so I can eat more cheese,

A joke isn't yours. It's used and you don't know where it's been.

My ideal meal would probably be the cheesiest pasta or pizza, followed by something creamy and chocolaty. I mean, just the worst things, really.

You could easily spot any Religion of Peace. Its extremist members would be extremely peaceful.

Life is so interesting ... just every day life. I remember someone once saying: "Drama is real life with the boring bits taken out."

I feel that a lot of British comedy is often too bombastic, too obvious, dressing up and shouting and pulling funny faces.

The best way to avoid criticism is never do anything ever. Or, do what you love, have a great life & let others spend their time criticising.

Opinions don't affect facts. But facts should affect opinions, and do, if you're rational

Someone asked me what three things I would save if my house was on fire. I said my cat, my salamander and one of the twins.

The next time someone is critical of you, just take a moment to consider their life. Then smile to yourself.

Being honest is what counts. To make the ordinary extraordinary is so much better than starting with the extraordinary.