Your Not Funny Quotes
Collection of top 68 famous quotes about Your Not Funny
Your Not Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Your Not Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Remember, I'm the only person her who's paid to be nice to you. But not too nice. Give me any lip and I'll break your face. OK?
— Orson Scott Card
Self-doubt is a persuasive mistress; careful not to shag her or you'll never get your balls back. - Simon Hunt
— Dannika Dark
Women are like shower faucets, you must treat them carefully, because if you do not, it will either burn your balls or freeze your ass.
— M.F. Moonzajer
Do not complain about two things; your job and your position, because you can always change them.
— M.F. Moonzajer
Funny the way it is, not right or wrong, somebody's heart is broken, and it becomes your favorite song.
— Dave Matthews Band
In a funny way, nothing makes you feel more like a native of your own country than to live where nearly everyone is not.
— Bill Bryson
Besides, my drinking blood's not nearly as weird as that time I caught you shaving your legs.""I was curious! — Molly Harper
Woah, their gorgeous not so fast I haven't even catched your name or your number - Jaxson Evans
— Brit Gosik
I do not think, Prospero,' he said, 'that one should attribute a very high degree of reality to your house.
— John Bellairs
You're not exactly up for the Humanitarian of the Year award, so save your altruism for someone who can't see through you like cellophane.
— Rebecca McNutt
When you bump into your own mom at an orgy, it's hard not to get her to read into certain things.
— Russell Brand
If I could get hold of something nasty and drop it in the coffee urn, I could poison them all.""Too bad your personality's not water-soluble. — Jesse Hajicek
- and you'll remember, when they ask you your religion, that you're a Cath'lic. Better say Roman Cath'lic, tho' I'm not fond of the word.
— Rudyard Kipling
Your name. That's all I want. I debate on whether or not I should explain to him that my name isn't going to help him in his stalking endeavours.
— Colleen Hoover
You know, albums are a funny thing. They're not like an intellectual decision. It's a collection of your kind of musings.
— Glen Hansard
It's funny how many people will come to Vegas to see your show where they might not come out to see you unless you come to their hometown.
— Reba McEntire
If you are not your own doctor, you are a fool.
— Hippocrates
That's not what I'm asking. I'm asking, what's your vice and what brand of trouble does it lead to?
— Neal Stephenson
Your pretense does not fool me, gnome. My eye will be upon you.
— Cassandra Clare
I Don't care which president is sucking your dick at the moment, I will not be a party to the killing of innocent men!
— Brandice Snowden Demon's Veil
Don't plead with anyone if you were not at fault, you'll only look inferior, stupid and funny, bolster your ego by doing the undoing.
— Michael Bassey Johnson
My sisters call him Slinky Simon.'Alec chuckled.
'It's only funny if he's not your cousin.'
'It's funny because it's true. — Julia Quinn
I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but look at me, I'm a huge celebrity.
— Ellen DeGeneres
It's funny, 'cause you think surfing is your whole life, but then when you make a family it seems like it's not at all.
— Joel Parkinson
The first time someone said, 'What are your measurements?' I answered, '37, 24, 38 - but not necessarily in that order.'
— Carol Burnett
You should write about your life. It's kind of funny. When it's not depressing as hell.
— Jeni Decker
I got to play with Nintendo's Wii, yes it's a funny name and not very revolutionary but it was fun whipping your arms around.
— Olivia Munn
Go slowly, so that you do not bite your tail by accident.
— Christopher Paolini
Funny, 'ow you can 'old a jewel in your 'and, and toss it away, and not even know what you 'ad until it's gone.
— Jennifer Donnelly
What are you assholes looking at?" "Nothing," said Radar. "We're certainly not looking at your eyebrows.
— John Green
Don't be concerned about others not appreciating you. Be concerned about your not appreciating others.
— Confucius
It's best not to get settled on things being a certain way, I realized. Life had a funny way if interrupting your plans.
— Tracey Porter
Are you real?" Stupid. Of course he's real."Yes, Julie. I'm not the mystical man from your dreams. — Caroline George
No funny business. I'll scream and dead or not it will hurt your ears
— Penelope Fletcher
Brookfield High School. How may I direct your call? No, sir, this is not a waste- disposal unit, I'm afraid you have the wrong number.
— Jaclyn Moriarty
Eat your heart out. Oh, wait. You can't. It's not organic.
— Susan Elizabeth Phillips
A foolproof plan for not getting a job - show up for your interview wearing flip flops.
— Alan Davies
Funny thing how when you reach out, people tend to reach right back. Best, then, to make sure your hand is open and not fisted.
— Richelle E. Goodrich
Do not let a flattering woman coax and wheedle you and deceive you; she is after your barn.
— Hesiod
There's nothing on it worthwhile, and we're not going to watch it in this household, and I don't want it in your intellectual diet.
— Philo Farnsworth
Not every woman you meet falls for your good looks"He folded his arms across his chest and raised an eyebrow. "So you think I look good? — Cindy Roland Anderson
It turns out your not dyslexic, your just really really stupid.
— Frankie Boyle
Have enough sense to know, ahead of time, when your skills will not extend to wallpapering.
— Marilyn Vos Savant
It's not funny anymore...", did you heard your self, you are entering a position called, "I wanna be a victim..., please take me".
— Deyth Banger
Act your age, not your shoe size.
— Prince
FYI, baby, havin' your attitude back is so far from annoying, it's not fuckin' funny.
— Kristen Ashley
Foul!" yelled Jamie, who seemed extremely happy not to be the one facing a blade. "Distracting technique! Put your shirt back on right now.
— Sarah Rees Brennan
The fate of the world depends upon whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your relatives ..." ~ Skulduggery Pleasant
— Derek Landy
