You Are Not Funny Quotes
Collection of top 46 famous quotes about You Are Not Funny
You Are Not Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational You Are Not Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
Women are like shower faucets, you must treat them carefully, because if you do not, it will either burn your balls or freeze your ass.
— M.F. Moonzajer
Always warm up the audience with a joke ... If you are not a particularly funny person, make sure that you inform them that it's a joke ...
— Jacob M. Appel
If you are truly offended by an 80-year-old man saying you're not funny, then you're probably not funny.
— Sarah Silverman
If I let you go are you going to hit me again?""What do you think?"
"Then I'm not going to let you go. — Sarah Mayberry
You know, albums are a funny thing. They're not like an intellectual decision. It's a collection of your kind of musings.
— Glen Hansard
Forgive me ... I called you an idiot. I spoke too hastily. You are not. Had I given it more thought, I would have called you a scoundrel.
— Lloyd Alexander
If you are not your own doctor, you are a fool.
— Hippocrates
Don't be a luddy-duddy! Don't be a mooncalf! Don't be a jabbernowl! You're not those, are you?
— W.C. Fields
You are not to say 'stink,' " interrupted Helen; "at least, you may say it, but you must pretend you are being funny while you say it.
— E. M. Forster
It's not funny anymore...", did you heard your self, you are entering a position called, "I wanna be a victim..., please take me".
— Deyth Banger
Comedy is a meritocracy. If you are funny, you are there. If you are not, you are out.
— Kevin Feige
Don't think you are looking at me because you are not.
— Eugene Ormandy
Brooke?" he finally found the sense to ask. "What are you doing here?""I need a gun."
This was not how his dream was supposed to go. — Shannon K. Butcher
Once you get past funny, my other qualities are so below average. It's not like I'm handy.
— Seth Meyers
I hate stand-up comics; I think funny is something you are, not something you desperately try to be in front of a roomful of obnoxious people.
— Peter Cameron
Are you real?" Stupid. Of course he's real."Yes, Julie. I'm not the mystical man from your dreams. — Caroline George
What are you assholes looking at?" "Nothing," said Radar. "We're certainly not looking at your eyebrows.
— John Green
My darling, you are indisposed! You must remain abed for the next eight months. Little Buford - ""I am NOT naming our child Buford ... — Cassandra Clare
Sometimes we know people who aretoo wonderful for words. I am not one of them.
Or you, for that matter, as you well know. — Michael Hogan
Are you . . . lost?" "Not really," she told him. "We just don't know where we're going. — Joel N. Ross
When I tell people I'm a comedian they say, 'Oh, are you funny?' I say, 'No, it's not that kind of comedy.'
— Susan Sarandon
Maybe you should make me a list of people I can kill and ways in which they're allowed to die," he said. "You are not funny." "I'm very funny.
— Ilona Andrews
To all the girls out there who think being funny is not sexy, you are wrong!
— Chad Michael Murray
You aren't a morning person, are you?" he mused."No, I'm not. There is a reason mornin' and mournin' sound the same. — L.A. Casey
Back from where? you're not going out again and leaving me here are you?? Holy Hercules I sound like somebody's wife
— Ruth Downie
You know what love means? It means loving the person you are now and not the person you want someone to be or the person they will be.
— Samantha Stroh Bailey
Don't be so humble - you are not that great.
— Golda Meir
Are you okay?" I (Cassie) call up to him."Um. Define okay." (Ben)
"Okay means you're not bleeding to death."
"I'm okay. — Rick Yancey
The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you.
— Criss Jami
I can eat you at breakfast, not because I am a monster; it is only because you are too cute and yummy.
— M.F. Moonzajer
Stop teasing you two," Suzy jumped in, "not all of Kathy's ideas are wacky.""Gee thanks. Was that supposed to be a compliment? — E.A. Bucchianeri
I think you should know that real-life white people are not all as funny as the ones on 'Seinfeld'.
— Aaron McGruder
You're not worried about being compromised, are you?" he asked. "Because I've already done that.
— Lisa Kleypas
I like situational comedy when people are being completely serious and yet you can find something extremely funny, not jokes.
— Bruce Robinson
When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're 42-42-42. There's more of you, but you are not worth as much.
— Joel Barnett, Baron Barnett