You A Joke Quotes

Collection of top 100 famous quotes about You A Joke

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You A Joke Quotes By Helen Gurley Brown: Laugh a little when the joke's on you Laugh a little when the joke's on you Helen Gurley Brown
You A Joke Quotes By Bob Newhart: Dick Martin, if you put a gun to Dick Martin, if you put a gun to his forehead, he couldn't tell you a joke. Bob Newhart
You A Joke Quotes By Alan Moore: Once you realize what a joke everything is, Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense. — Alan Moore
You A Joke Quotes By Stephan Pastis: A comic strip has a rhythm and a A comic strip has a rhythm and a pattern, and you got to get in and out quick. So you set up a joke, tell the joke, and done. — Stephan Pastis
You A Joke Quotes By Jonathan Tropper: Pity, I've learned, is like a fart. You Pity, I've learned, is like a fart. You can tolerate your own, but you simply can't stand anyone else's. — Jonathan Tropper
You A Joke Quotes By Andrew Barger: If you can't laugh at your life, then If you can't laugh at your life, then your life is a punchline in a bad joke. — Andrew Barger
You A Joke Quotes By Richelle Mead: You make a joke out of everything.Life's too You make a joke out of everything.
Life's too painful not to. — Richelle Mead
You A Joke Quotes By Matt Haig: Everyone is a comedy. If people are laughing Everyone is a comedy. If people are laughing at you, they just don't quite understand the joke that is themselves. — Matt Haig
You A Joke Quotes By Gwyneth Paltrow: [When] you're dying laughing because your three-year-old made [When] you're dying laughing because your three-year-old made a fart joke, it doesn't matter what else is going on. That's real happiness. — Gwyneth Paltrow
You A Joke Quotes By Kurt Vonnegut: If I should ever die, God forbid, I If I should ever die, God forbid, I hope you will say, 'Kurt is up in heaven now.' That's my favorite joke. — Kurt Vonnegut
You A Joke Quotes By Kurt Vonnegut: A joke is like building a mousetrap from A joke is like building a mousetrap from scratch. You have to work pretty hard to make the thing snap when it is supposed to snap. — Kurt Vonnegut
You A Joke Quotes By Ira Gershwin: The future of this nation, with the present The future of this nation, with the present generation, You must admit is nothing but a joke — Ira Gershwin
You A Joke Quotes By Lemony Snicket: Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding. — Lemony Snicket
You A Joke Quotes By David Chase: I really like comedy. There's always a choice, I really like comedy. There's always a choice, when you're writing: you can either go for the joke or you can go for the story, the important stuff. — David Chase
You A Joke Quotes By Elliott James: Sometimes, the universe just does what the universe Sometimes, the universe just does what the universe wants to do, and screw you if you can't take a joke. I — Elliott James
You A Joke Quotes By David Levithan: Crave, v.: Nothing makes me feel as welcome Crave, v.: Nothing makes me feel as welcome in the world as the sound of you laughing at a joke I've made. — David Levithan
You A Joke Quotes By Isla Fisher: Comedy has always been important in my family. Comedy has always been important in my family. If you got in a good joke at the dinner table, it meant more than almost anything else. — Isla Fisher
You A Joke Quotes By David Mandel: All of a sudden, making a Spanish-American War All of a sudden, making a Spanish-American War joke. I think you sort of had to go to probably to an American high school to have remembered that. — David Mandel
You A Joke Quotes By G. Norman Lippert: Thought you were making a James Band Joke. Thought you were making a James Band Joke. Hard to tell with that accent — G. Norman Lippert
You A Joke Quotes By Erin Hanson: Your blindness to my downfall,Has gone too far Your blindness to my downfall,
Has gone too far to be a joke,
As I stand ablaze before you,
And you tell me you smell smoke. — Erin Hanson
You A Joke Quotes By Mike Wilmot: Wanna play a joke on your chiropractor? The Wanna play a joke on your chiropractor? The next time he starts working on you, go limp and soil yourself. — Mike Wilmot
You A Joke Quotes By Ellen O'Connell: Your skin is white, but I think the Your skin is white, but I think the white god made a mistake, or maybe he did it on purpose to play a joke. He gave you an Apache heart. — Ellen O'Connell
You A Joke Quotes By Suzanne Wrightt: In a perfectworld I would be taller, you In a perfect
world I would be taller, you would be alive,
and chickens could cross the road without
being the subject of a joke. — Suzanne Wrightt
You A Joke Quotes By Bob Saget: I think when you dissect a joke too I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy. — Bob Saget
You A Joke Quotes By Hank Azaria: Guys will definitely settle for women who get Guys will definitely settle for women who get the joke. But a woman who can make you laugh? It's not high on a guy's must list. Perhaps it should be. — Hank Azaria
You A Joke Quotes By Emma Cline: Adults always teased me about having boyfriends, but Adults always teased me about having boyfriends, but there was an age where it was no longer a joke, the idea that boys might actually want you. — Emma Cline
You A Joke Quotes By Chrissy Voeg: What happens when you tell an egg a What happens when you tell an egg a joke? A: — Chrissy Voeg
You A Joke Quotes By Andrew Hudgins: Taking the time to polish a pun or Taking the time to polish a pun or fine-tune a practical joke is a way of saying, 'I'm thinking about you and I want to please you.' — Andrew Hudgins
You A Joke Quotes By Adventure Time: When bad things happen, I know you want When bad things happen, I know you want to believe they are a joke, But sometimes life is scary and dark. That is why we must find the light. — Adventure Time
You A Joke Quotes By N.R. Walker: You know, there's a joke in there somewhere. You know, there's a joke in there somewhere. A Highlander, a Viking, and a Samurai walk into a bar. — N.R. Walker
You A Joke Quotes By S.A. Tawks: You can't draw lines in the sand like You can't draw lines in the sand like that. Humour's a tsunami that doesn't care about your little lines. — S.A. Tawks
You A Joke Quotes By Becca Fitzpatrick: Nora & Patch:N:Is everything a joke to you?P:Not Nora & Patch:
N:Is everything a joke to you?
P:Not everything.
N:Like what?
P:You. — Becca Fitzpatrick
You A Joke Quotes By Jonathan Tropper: The music from my youth has aged poorly The music from my youth has aged poorly and is now like a joke out of context. You had to be there. — Jonathan Tropper
You A Joke Quotes By Neil Strauss: Loneliness is holding in a joke because you Loneliness is holding in a joke because you have no one to share it with. — Neil Strauss
You A Joke Quotes By David Nicholls: A joke was not a single-use item but A joke was not a single-use item but something you brought out again and again until it fell apart in your hand like a cheap umbrella. — David Nicholls
You A Joke Quotes By Brandon Nolta: Perhaps you are Coyote in disguise and have Perhaps you are Coyote in disguise and have chosen a spectacularly inappropriate time for a joke. — Brandon Nolta
You A Joke Quotes By Nick Kroll: I found, especially with stand-up, that if a I found, especially with stand-up, that if a premise works, you can make the joke work. If a premise doesn't work, you can't force it to. — Nick Kroll
You A Joke Quotes By Bill Bryson: When you tell an Iowan a joke, you When you tell an Iowan a joke, you can see a kind of race going on between his brain and his expression. — Bill Bryson
You A Joke Quotes By Tina Fey: No, that part's not true! That's a joke-lie. No, that part's not true! That's a joke-lie. I'm not going to lie to you in this story because I want you to know that the rest of it is true. — Tina Fey
You A Joke Quotes By Benjamin Walker: You never know when you'll have a bad You never know when you'll have a bad idea for a worse joke. — Benjamin Walker
You A Joke Quotes By Ryan North: If you find you are not understanding my If you find you are not understanding my explaination for a joke, hit F5 on your browser and the page will refresh and I will explain it again. — Ryan North
You A Joke Quotes By C.S. Lewis: You've no idea how good an old joke You've no idea how good an old joke sounds when you take it out again after a rest of five or six hundred years. — C.S. Lewis
You A Joke Quotes By Neil Gaiman: Hey, that's life, flick it off if you Hey, that's life, flick it off if you can't take a joke. — Neil Gaiman
You A Joke Quotes By Jon Schmidt: It used to bother me when people called It used to bother me when people called me a pussy. But the joke's on them - after all, you are what you eat! — Jon Schmidt
You A Joke Quotes By Tony Randall: In fact, it used to be a joke In fact, it used to be a joke if you studied at a University. — Tony Randall
You A Joke Quotes By Cass Sunstein: The opening scene in A New Hope, when The opening scene in A New Hope, when you see the huge ship, it goes on, and on, and on, and on, and on ... that is like a joke of awesomeness. — Cass Sunstein
You A Joke Quotes By Joseph Rosenbloom: What do you call a rifle with three What do you call a rifle with three barrels?
A trifle. — Joseph Rosenbloom
You A Joke Quotes By Jonathan Tropper: But that's why you pay for insurance, right? But that's why you pay for insurance, right? If you never file a claim, then they've beaten you. — Jonathan Tropper
You A Joke Quotes By Bill Burr: Once you do a joke and it works Once you do a joke and it works it's only good for so long, like shooting fish in a barrel. — Bill Burr
You A Joke Quotes By Henry Ward Beecher: Some people are so dry that you might Some people are so dry that you might soak them in a joke for a month and it would not get through their skins. — Henry Ward Beecher
You A Joke Quotes By Jeb Bradley: I like to joke that if I had I like to joke that if I had a dollar for everybody who slapped me on the back and said, 'Hey Jeb, you're all set,' I'd be retired now. — Jeb Bradley
You A Joke Quotes By Karen Traviss: If you can't take a joke, you shouldn't If you can't take a joke, you shouldn't have joined. — Karen Traviss
You A Joke Quotes By Crystal Evans: I made a man out of you, you I made a man out of you, you made a joke out of me. — Crystal Evans
You A Joke Quotes By Susan Cain: (Finland is a famously introverted nation. Finnish joke: (Finland is a famously introverted nation. Finnish joke: How can you tell if a Finn likes you? He's staring at your shoes instead of his own.) — Susan Cain
You A Joke Quotes By J.M. Darhower: Look at you making a joke! You're funny. Look at you making a joke! You're funny. No wonder Carmine fell in love with you. — J.M. Darhower
You A Joke Quotes By Judy Greer: I think it's natural if you're doing a I think it's natural if you're doing a lot of comedy to do a lot of drama, because you have to figure out the real version of the joke. — Judy Greer
You A Joke Quotes By Maria Semple: I'm not the comedy police, but you watch I'm not the comedy police, but you watch a movie, and everyone's laughing, and then you shake it out, and you realize, 'There's no joke there!' — Maria Semple
You A Joke Quotes By Rob Zombie: You might like it as a joke or You might like it as a joke or because you liked it then, but there isn't a whole new generation discovering Wham!. — Rob Zombie
You A Joke Quotes By Kim Stanley Robinson: If you can't afford housing then the right If you can't afford housing then the right to vote is a bad joke. — Kim Stanley Robinson
You A Joke Quotes By E.B. White: You can dissect a joke just as you You can dissect a joke just as you can a frog. But it tends to die on you. — E.B. White
You A Joke Quotes By Stephen King: I like a woman who will laugh when I like a woman who will laugh when you don't have to point her right at the joke, you know — Stephen King
You A Joke Quotes By Jimmy Fallon: [Writing a joke] there is no team of [Writing a joke] there is no team of writers. It's just you in an office, staring at yourself in the mirror. — Jimmy Fallon
You A Joke Quotes By Charli McBride: You really should learn how to take a You really should learn how to take a joke, as easily as you take a dick."

-Shirley — Charli McBride
You A Joke Quotes By Milton Berle: I have a file of four million jokes I have a file of four million jokes ... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have a joke on it. — Milton Berle
You A Joke Quotes By Heather Sellers: When something makes no sense, sometimes you make When something makes no sense, sometimes you make something of it. A joke. A spiritual practice. A life. — Heather Sellers
You A Joke Quotes By Elizabeth Rodriguez: When you have a tough childhood, you either When you have a tough childhood, you either cry or make a joke. — Elizabeth Rodriguez
You A Joke Quotes By Steven Wright: If you tell a joke in the forest, If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke? — Steven Wright
You A Joke Quotes By Andy Roddick: I'll be the first to admit it, the I'll be the first to admit it, the life I'm leading is basically a joke. I should probably be cooler about it, but I can't fake it, you know? — Andy Roddick
You A Joke Quotes By Charlton Heston: I've come to feel very strongly, not as I've come to feel very strongly, not as a joke, that if you appoint a committee of more than four people, their efficiency starts to deteriorate. — Charlton Heston
You A Joke Quotes By Joan D. Vinge: Sometimes she talked like a poet; she made Sometimes she talked like a poet; she made a little joke of it, so that you wouldn't mind. — Joan D. Vinge
You A Joke Quotes By Aziz Ansari: What's cool about Twitter is that you can What's cool about Twitter is that you can make a joke about something very of-the-moment or random that I wouldn't be able to joke about in stand-up. — Aziz Ansari
You A Joke Quotes By Nicola Yoon: oh jesus. that is not a good joke oh jesus. that is not a good joke Madeline: Made you smile though. Olly: yeah it did — Nicola Yoon
You A Joke Quotes By Garrison Keillor: You can go your whole life and not You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy. — Garrison Keillor
You A Joke Quotes By Jamaica Kincaid: A professional writer is a joke. You write A professional writer is a joke. You write because you can't do anything else, and then you have another job. — Jamaica Kincaid
You A Joke Quotes By Chloe Neill: If you can't make a joke at a If you can't make a joke at a time like this, what's the point of living? — Chloe Neill
You A Joke Quotes By Elisabeth Naughton: Joke in book:You know the difference between a Joke in book:
You know the difference between a brownnoser and a shithead, right? Depth perception. — Elisabeth Naughton
You A Joke Quotes By George Bernard Shaw: Suppose the world were only one of God's Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one? — George Bernard Shaw
You A Joke Quotes By Howie Carr: Barack Obama is like the old joke about Barack Obama is like the old joke about boats. The two best days of owning a boat are the day you buy it and the day you sell it. — Howie Carr
You A Joke Quotes By Vardan Hambardzumyan: - I'm a Neuroscientist.- What's that? What do - I'm a Neuroscientist.
- What's that? What do you study?
- I study your brain! — Vardan Hambardzumyan
You A Joke Quotes By Simone Elkeles: Why are you making a joke out of Why are you making a joke out of this?" she asks.
"Because it's stupid, Nik. There's not even room in my day to think about someone else. — Simone Elkeles
You A Joke Quotes By Steve Coogan: I think you need to have the guts I think you need to have the guts to not use comedy. Often, the people that work in comedy use a joke to avoid contemplation. — Steve Coogan
You A Joke Quotes By Eliza Lentzski: No, I will not make out with you." No, I will not make out with you." Her red lips curled up. "Did you just try to make a joke, Madam Prosecutor?" I smirked. — Eliza Lentzski