What In The Funny Quotes: top 72 famous quotes about What In The Funny

What In The Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational What In The Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

A Polish man in a helicopter. Goes up to 800 feet. Down it comes! What happened? "It got chilly up there, so I turned off the fan!" — Henny Youngman

I'm always doing what I can to look for and just feel out funny things that are happening in the scene and improvise off of them. — Thomas Lennon

It's not that comedy has changed in terms of what's funny. For me, it's changed in that sometimes I don't feel my finger is on the pulse. — Bobby Lee

I had no idea what they were saying in Italian as a child, they spoke too quickly on the radio. But I realized that language was very funny. — Dominic Chianese

I mean, my age is just a number. So what if you were born in the era when they still used rotary phones and cassette tapes? I think it's cute. — T.S. Krupa

Kids cannot follow stories. They don't know what the hell is going on in a cartoon. They like to see funny visual things happening. — John Kricfalusi

So what I tend to do is to think of today as the past. It's funny when you comin in first but you hope that you last.. You just hope that it lasts. — Drake

The Yankees are only interested in one thing, and I have no idea what that is. — Luis Polonia

What's funny in 'The Mayor of MacDougal Street' is how Dave Van Ronk talks a lot about the time and how exciting it was and how electric it was. — Oscar Isaac

So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is." — Tim Vine

They've done away with those committees. That shows the success of what the Soviets were able to do in this country. — Ronald Reagan

Anxiety in human life is what squeaking and grinding are in machinery that is not oiled. In life, trust is the oil. — Henry Ward Beecher

Well, you are a wolf, I don't think it's a good idea to start the habit of you sleeping in the bed, you know, with all the shedding and what-not. — Quinn Loftis

What in the actual hell of all nine circles of Hell was this? — J. Lynn

An "EX" is called an "ex" because it's an EXample of what you shouldn't have again in the future. — Unknown

Life is what you make it. Unless some guy finds you with his girl. Then the ball's pretty much in his court. — Lois Greiman

She couldn't hold in her irritation. "What's so funny?"
He reached out and touched the tip of her nose.
"You. — Caroline Fyffe

The only thing you got in this world is what you can sell. And the funny thing is that you're a salesman, and you don't know that. — Arthur Miller

Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked.
How would I know? What, am I an expert in the study of pee? — John Green

So, you invite a wild rabbit living in Italy to a party on the island of Crete. What's it supposed to do, swim there? Its little tux would get wet. — Rick Riordan

The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. — Tim Vine

What do you see in him anyway?" "He doesn't leave the toilet seat up." I smiled bitterly — Jayde Scott

Plus, in one of his e-mails, the guy said he didn't like pancakes. What kind of asshole doesn't like pancakes? — A. J. Jacobs

(Regarding Titanic) Sometimes Zalmai would saunter in and watch this game. What did he get to be, he asked. "You can be the iceberg," said Aziza. — Khaled Hosseini

I once punched a bloke in the face for saying 'Hawk the Slayer' was rubbish, when what I should have said 'Dad, you're wrong.' — Bill Bailey

Then it suddenly and theatrically began to clean itself in the way cats do when they want you to know what a big deal you aren't. — Adam Rex

What I would do in order to be popular was, I'd put myself on line and joke around and be funny, and I was always known as the crazy kid. — Leonardo DiCaprio

The first time someone said, 'What are your measurements?' I answered, '37, 24, 38 - but not necessarily in that order.' — Carol Burnett

What? Okay, back up. How in the hell do you 'turn up missing'? — Kevin Hart

I mean what good does it do anyone to kill themselves working, because the worms will get you in the end. — Dorothy Gish

What?" he asked. "You're staring at me funny."
"We're in the wrong movie," I confessed. — Lou Harper

(One does not simply walk into Mordor--except that was exactly what everyone in the story did anyway.) — Jim Butcher

Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What's it spell? HEAD FUCK.
- Jane — J.R. Ward

Let's focus on the funny ... That's what I'm focused on ... This is the gift God gave me. That's what I want to touch in people. — Tracy Morgan

2 Jewish women in New York. One says, "Do you see what's going on in Poland?" The other says, "I live in the back, I don't see anything." — Henny Youngman

In comedy, though, it's good to get feedback from the audience about what they find funny. — Bobby Farrelly

Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian. — Adam Carolla

What the fuck?" That was me. Pete's not an f-word kinda guy. Me? My current record is eighty-two F-bombs in under a minute. — Adrienne Wilder

If you work at comedy too laboriously, you can kill what's funny in the joke. — Richard Russo

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you. — Criss Jami

Funny, that no one had ever asked what had happened to the dishes, the scraps, the crumbs in the photographs, on the poster. — Anna Quindlen

And the challenge in the next round would be determined by the winner of this test. "Like, what, the DOM-matrix?" ~Tara Reese — Lucian Bane

What's funny about my group of friends is that none of us ever went to the same school. None of us lived in the same part of town. — Mila Kunis

You know, it's funny what you'll miss when you're away from home. Now me, I miss the smell of coffee ... and bacon frying in the morning. — Fannie Flagg

I was raised by just my mom. See, my father died when I was eight years old. At least, that's what he told us in the letter.. — Drew Carey

I wanted to beat the heck out of the JV guys for that, except I wouldn't know what to do in a fistfight without a manual. — Carrie Harris

The important question is, what will your wear for a wedding dress, Alexia? You look horrible in white. — Gail Carriger

There is an enduring freshness in what remains strange and obscure which the cliches of greatness can only evoke nostalgia for. — Bauvard

I like drama. I love being in a drama where I get to be the funny guy. That's what I really love the most. — John Leguizamo

Wealth and rank are what people desire, but unless they are obtained in the right way they may not be possessed. — Confucius

Situated in some nebulous distance I do what I do so that the universal balance of which I am a part may remain a balance. — Antonio Porchia

Too many writers get stuck in the trap of writing what they think is funny and not considering who they are writing it for. — Robin Thede

It is best one should quote what one doesn't understand at all in the language one knows the least — Voltaire

Ernie thought - what's the expression? - that he had a couple of kangaroos loose in the top paddock. — Louis Nowra

There's no time to waste," Kai said. He did a backflip off the tower and ran off.
"What is it with that guy?" Jay asked. "Always in a rush! — Greg Farshtey

T's funny, but your parents can give you everything in the world, but they can't teach you what to do with it. That, you have to learn for yourself. — Amanda Carpenter

Well, first you have to be very, very funny. I have realized that it is essential for a boy to be funny. Otherwise, what is the point in a boy? — Jaclyn Moriarty

The whimsicalness of our own humor is a thousand times more fickle and unaccountable than what we blame so much in fortune. — Francois De La Rochefoucauld

The funny thing is, in reality we all just presume that life is going to happen when we wake up in the morning. What if it didn't? — A. Antares

What in the fuck are you? — Jennifer L. Armentrout

The great William Shakespeare said, "What's in a name?" He also said, "Call me Billy one more time and I will stab you with this ink quill. — Cuthbert Soup

In the morning, people have a plan for that day. Hardworking people think of what they will do during the day, and idle people on what they should do. — Eraldo Banovac

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance. — Will Rogers

Ben walks in the room and asks, "What were you guys doing?" Nikki says "Nothing" at the same time I say, "Your sister and I were just makin' out. — Simone Elkeles

You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D's in school. Well guess what, I get F's!!! — Bill Watterson

I look for the meaning in what's funny, and I look for what's funny about things that are meaningful to me. — Harold Ramis

Yes, it's funny, isn't it? You try to do what's best for the people you love, and you just end up in trouble for your efforts. — Kirsten Miller

What I've lost in years I've gained in wisdom. Bullshit, I haven't learnt one thing in the last 15 years that hasn't just depressed me more. — Doug Stanhope

What do you call a rifle with three barrels?
A trifle. — Joseph Rosenbloom

If there's a sexier sound on this planet than the person you're in love with cooing over the crepes you made for him, I don't know what it is. — Julie Powell

He has no idea what it was like to grow up in the South, where you had to hold your head down. — Fred Allen

Say, Cuttino. What are those Godawful clothes you're wearing? Man, this ain't Rhode Island anymore. You're in the NBA. The girls have teeth here. — Charles Barkley