What A Joke Quotes: top 57 famous quotes about What A Joke

What A Joke Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational What A Joke quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

What do we care, if the world is a joke? We'll give it a big kiss, we'll give it a poke. Death wears a big hat cause he's a big bloke. — Elvis Costello

What's the difference between Darling Cruel, the wind, and a vacuum? A vacuum only sucks. The wind only blows. But Darling sucks, blows, and swallows. — Sherrilyn Kenyon

If sex isn't a joke, what is it? — Nella Larsen

A nickname may be the best record of a success. That's what I call putting the face of a joke upon the body of a truth. — Joseph Conrad

What if it's just a big, cosmic joke?
Then ... laugh!
.85. — Dee Lestari

A lot of times, you could play me just the laughs from my set, and I could tell you, from the laugh, what the joke was. Because they match. — Jerry Seinfeld

What's the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws, and one is a pause at the end of a clause. — Geoff Tibballs

Piper: it looks like we have hole. Percy: Yeah we've got a dam hole! (LOL-ing) Piper: What! Percy: Inside joke. (still LOL-ing) Piper: Whatever. — Rick Riordan

Like great art, something essential dies when great jokes are explained. So what's the key to telling a good joke/creating great art timing. — Travis Nichols

Crusaders have just f-ked me over what a bas-rd joke, excuse my language I'm absolutely furious. — Keith Senior

My point is, I went crazy. When I saw what a black, awful joke the world was. I went crazy as a coot! I admit it! Why can't you? — Alan Moore

Salander in love. What a fucking joke. — Stieg Larsson

It goes on top and breaks down,
It can emit a high or low sound.
Each atom of such noisy chute
Exhale the aroma of a ripe fruit. — Ana Claudia Antunes

What I don't like today is, to put it coarsely, the phony Hasidism, the phony mysticism. Many students say, "Teach me mysticism." It's a joke. — Elie Wiesel

C: What do you get when a giant sneezes?
Out of the way. - Marigold — Jean Ferris

I have a really analytical approach to art. And the whole idea that you can't analyze what makes a joke funny ... I do not agree with that at all. — David Rees

What the joke displays is a switch in perception. This is important in changing the way we think. — Edward De Bono

Why do we have to humiliate someone to crack a joke??? Do what u would like people to do with u.. — Honeya

What happened when the Verb asked the noun to conjugate? She said "no-no!", forgot the "o" and decided to become a nun! — Ana Claudia Antunes

I lived that life for real, so to talk about it was like a joke, you know what I mean? — Tone-Loc

It's unpleasantly like being drunk."
"What's so unpleasant about being drunk?"
"You ask a glass of water. — Douglas Adams

If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it? — Henny Youngman

Is everything a joke to you?" I asked. He dabbed his tongue to his lip again. "Not everything." "Like what?" "You. — Becca Fitzpatrick

What a fucking joke. — Aravind Adiga

You learn what can become a good joke and can be repeatable. You have a shorthand about how to introduce a joke to someone. — Lennon Parham

Gweneth [sic] Paltrow is a joke. Her life is like taking bullets for a soldier. What a joke! My 2 sons serving in the military should talk to her, — Cindy McCain

Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke. — Ambrose Bierce

A cross with yellow roses. What a fucking thing. It was like an electric chair with floral-print cushions, a bad joke. — Anonymous

I rarely joke unless I'm in front of a camera. It's not what I am in real life. It's what I do for a living. — Christopher Guest

rights are honored only in the breach. most people don't get agents or cops assigned to them until they're already raped or dead. — Patricia Cornwell

What a joke! Poor little rich girl's fallen in love with the Republic's most famous criminal. — Marie Lu

If someone wants to make a joke about me smoking too much pot, I'm not going to get mad at them, because I've put it out there that that's what I do. — Doug Benson

If life is merely a joke, the question still remains: for whose amusement?
No one knows what he can do till he tries. — Publilius Syrus

And what exactly is a dream and what exactly is a joke. — Syd Barrett

[When] you're dying laughing because your three-year-old made a fart joke, it doesn't matter what else is going on. That's real happiness. — Gwyneth Paltrow

Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding. — Lemony Snicket

Sometimes, the universe just does what the universe wants to do, and screw you if you can't take a joke. I — Elliott James

I don't like jokes in speeches. I do like wit and humor. A joke is to humor what pornography is to erotic language in a good novel. — James C. Humes

What happens when you tell an egg a joke? A: — Chrissy Voeg

What if life is just a cosmic joke, like spiders in your underwear. — Jimmy Buffett

Catering on planes, like on British Rail, is a standing joke, but I don't really have a problem with it. I don't quite know what people expect. — Phil Collins

Nora & Patch:
N:Is everything a joke to you?
P:Not everything.
N:Like what?
P:You. — Becca Fitzpatrick

"What a joke: Tiny living entities crawling on a little planet and are thinking, "I am Great". " — Radhanath Swami

I think it's important to have a good sense of humor and joke around with your kids. That's what I do a lot. — Stanley Tucci

It used to bother me when people called me a pussy. But the joke's on them - after all, you are what you eat! — Jon Schmidt

Actually, being married to me probably would be something of a joke ... but yeah, I mean it. What do you think? — Danielle Steel

What do you call a rifle with three barrels?
A trifle. — Joseph Rosenbloom

I think a lot of people misinterpret what I'm doing because they think of it as just a joke or they think of it as disposable. — Casey Spooner

It was that famous joke: What's the last thing the drummer said before he got kicked out of the band? 'Hey, I wrote a song.' — Dave Grohl

What's cool about Twitter is that you can make a joke about something very of-the-moment or random that I wouldn't be able to joke about in stand-up. — Aziz Ansari

If you can't make a joke at a time like this, what's the point of living? — Chloe Neill

- I'm a Neuroscientist.
- What's that? What do you study?
- I study your brain! — Vardan Hambardzumyan

We feel that what's too far is when you make a joke and somebody gets hurt. — Bobby Farrelly

I just heard the latest joke about my hair: 'Do you know what that is on her head? It's a steering wheel to drive the state.' — Yulia Tymoshenko

Well, what of it? If sex isn't a joke, what is it — Nella Larsen

I don't really like jokes in a way. I mean gags are fine but I like weird moments where what you have isn't really a joke, just tiny moments. — Noel Fielding

Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense. — Alan Moore