Spike Milligan Quotes
Collection of top 74 famous quotes about Spike Milligan
Spike Milligan Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Spike Milligan quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I told you I was sick.
— Spike Milligan
A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
— Spike Milligan
There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in,
But they're ever so small
That's why rain is thin. — Spike Milligan
A sure cure for seasickness is to stand underneath a tree.
— Spike Milligan
They're all the rage, Cab Calloway wears one.
— Spike Milligan
For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and finally with a piece of string.
— Spike Milligan
Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
— Spike Milligan
Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
— Spike Milligan
(On his gravestone): "I told you I was ill".
— Spike Milligan
I'm a hero wid coward's legs, I'm a hero from the waist up.
— Spike Milligan
Author, author, did you write these legs?( The Milligan- Puckoon
— Spike Milligan
The most difficult book I have ever read was a manual on the use of iron bangles by A.J. Thompson.
— Spike Milligan
Pakistani Dalek: Put him in the cur-ry
— Spike Milligan
I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.
— Spike Milligan
God made nightButMan made darkness.
— Spike Milligan
The clock in the church tower said 4.32, as it had done for three hundred years. It was right once a day and that was better than no clock at all.
— Spike Milligan
How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
— Spike Milligan
My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
— Spike Milligan
I told you I was ill. (On Millian's headstone)
— Spike Milligan
I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine. — Spike Milligan
A family man from SiberiaAs a father was very inferior
But one operation
Revised the situation
And now he's Mother Superior — Spike Milligan
Money can't buy you friends, but you do get a better class of enemy.
— Spike Milligan
I have a body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
— Spike Milligan
If you kill me, I promise you - you will never take me alive.
— Spike Milligan
Her mother was a cultivated woman - she was born in a greenhouse
— Spike Milligan
I can speak Esperanto like a native.
— Spike Milligan
I'm a hero with coward's legs.
— Spike Milligan
Professor Milligan will now play his tree! The composition is in A Minor, the tree is in A garden.
— Spike Milligan
Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
— Spike Milligan
All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
— Spike Milligan
It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't.
— Spike Milligan
Everybody has to be somewhere!
— Spike Milligan
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
— Spike Milligan
Said Hamlet to Ophelia,I'll draw a sketch of thee.
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B or not 2B? — Spike Milligan
Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A
— Spike Milligan
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
— Spike Milligan
A lot of learning canbe a little thing.
— Spike Milligan
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
— Spike Milligan
I'm Irish. We think sideways
— Spike Milligan
I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
— Spike Milligan
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light
— Spike Milligan
I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
— Spike Milligan
General: Where are you from? Spike: London. General: Which part? Spike: ... Well, all of me.
— Spike Milligan
My sister Laura's bigger than meAnd lifts me up quite easily.
I can't lift her, I've tried and tried;
She must have something heavy inside. — Spike Milligan
Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.
— Spike Milligan
We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
— Spike Milligan
After Puckoon I swore I'd never write another book. This is it
— Spike Milligan
If a robin redbreast in a cagePuts all heaven in a rage,
How feels heaven when
Dies the billionth battery hen? — Spike Milligan
We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
— Spike Milligan
It's all in the mind, you know.
— Spike Milligan
Therec all the rage, Cab Calaway wears one.
— Spike Milligan
With a roof over his head he had ceased to work, living off his [war] pension and his wits, both hopelessly inadequate.
— Spike Milligan
Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
— Spike Milligan
One day the "Don't Knows" will get in and then where will we be?
— Spike Milligan
Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
— Spike Milligan
Patience, thought Milligan, that word was invented by dull buggers who couldn't think quick enough.
— Spike Milligan
Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
— Spike Milligan
My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
— Spike Milligan
Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
— Spike Milligan
In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
— Spike Milligan
In the human race today, you came last.
— Spike Milligan
A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush
— Spike Milligan
Education isn't everything, for a start it isn't an elephant
— Spike Milligan
We don't have anything planned, so nothing can go wrong.
— Spike Milligan
My father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
— Spike Milligan
Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
— Spike Milligan
R.I.P.Tom Conlon O'Rourke.
Not Dead, just Sleeping. — Spike Milligan