Philosophy Humor Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Philosophy Humor

Philosophy Humor Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Philosophy Humor quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Don't bite off more than you can chew because nobody looks attractive spitting it back out. — Carroll Bryant

Some people live their memorable years fighting against their basic instincts only to succumb in the end to what was actually good for them. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

The trouble is you can shut your eyes but you can't shut your mind. — Terry Pratchett

They can't tell so much about you if you got your eyes closed. — Ken Kesey

We, humans, have come up with so many superficialities that are completely unnecessary for our existence and happiness on earth. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

The sun doesn't live in England; it comes here on holiday when we're all at work. — Benny Bellamacina

We're on a planet, relax! — Benny Bellamacina

Vomit and shit, even your own, stink. — Sheeja Jose

Writing is turning life's worst moments into money. — J.P. Donleavy

Philosophers, Poets and Fools have similar Consciousness — Amit Gupta

Sleepwalking is the perfect exorcise for lazy people — Benny Bellamacina

All around us is a nothing that stretches on for infinity. We humans can barely comprehend that. If we comprehend it we are rarely pleased. — F.K. Preston

With true love, you can move mountains, make unusual sacrifices, live a life of deprivations and still be happy. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

I'm a writer. I write stuff. — Kevin J.J. Carpenter

Sometimes it's better to fail with pride, than to succeed at a price — Benny Bellamacina

Blossoms are scattered by the wind and the wind cares nothing, but the blossoms of the heart no wind can touch. — Yoshida Kenko

Publish. Be damned. Repeat. — Tassa Desalada

When somebody you love dies, a phase of life's innocence dies with that person, and a part of you dies as well. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

If your treated like a puppet find a new ball of string — Benny Bellamacina

If your dreams seem to be drifting away, wake up! — Benny Bellamacina

It is hard enough to remember my opinions, without also remembering my reasons for them! — Friedrich Nietzsche

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. — Voltaire

He was a glass half full kind of person and she was ... what? The glass is going to break before you can even pour kind of person. Yikes. — Erin McCarthy

That's not a bad word ... hate and war are bad words, but fuck isn't. — Judy Blume

Laughter is the hand of God on the shoulder of a troubled world. — Grady Nutt

I'm looking into my past lives. I'm convinced some of them still owe me money. — Graham Parke

God helps those who strut their stuff. — Dan Sofer

If everyone wants to be somebody, I want to be somebody else — Benny Bellamacina

PHILOSOPHY OF LIFE
I have so much to do today.
I can't possibly get it all done,
so I'm not going to start. — Chocolate Waters

If those at your top are weak, your bottom will be rotten — Benny Bellamacina

Love make us poets, and the approach of death should make us philosophers. — George Santayana

Hindsight is usually more tragic than helpful. — Linda S. Godfrey

If Socrates was alive today he would say : I know that I know everything. That's what contemporary philosophers do. — Ljupka Cvetanova

The selfish and self-centered have a hard time being kind, even though you and I know that kindness is a source of relief to the soul. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

If you only go around once in life, then why has that one gone around more than once? — Brian Spellman

A tattoo is permanent; with a marriage you can more easily change your mind. — Carolyn V. Hamilton

I think I think, therefore I think I probably am. — David F. Porteous

My creativity keeps me from starving. Humanity keeps my life mundane. Loving secures my love for life, but my imagination keeps me sane. — F.K. Preston

All the world is queer save thee and me, and even thou art a little queer. — Robert Owen

A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment. — Frank Zappa

Have you ever noticed how 'What the hell' is always the right decision to make? — Terry Johnson

YOU are the big drop of dew under the lotus leaf,
I am the smaller one on its upper side,'
said the dewdrop to the lake. — Rabindranath Tagore

We always emerge from the death of a loved one like a phoenix arising from its funeral pyre. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

Perhaps fate has a way of turning things around and making something good out of the action of someone who failed humanity without meaning to. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

I don't like normal people they r bored. They do the same thing over and over again. — Nikhil Yadav

Life is a mighty joke that is not meant to be funny. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

My teacher asked my favorite color. ... I said 'Rainbow'.... and I was punished to stand out of my class. — Saket Assertive

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also. — Mark Twain

When you fall; it's not the ending; It's the next chance to perform better than the last one — Harishankar Kaushik

No matter where you go, there you are. — Keith Caserta

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.' But eating too many, is quite enough-plenty. And you'll have to go see the good doc anyway. — Solange Nicole

Be not afraid life with all its despair, pain and unhappiness is just a crucible wherein your brighter dreams are conceived, shaped and born — Rassool Jibraeel Snyman

There is no bigger gratification than the realization of the things you believe in after overcoming all the odds. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

It's no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then. — Lewis Carroll

A comedian is better than a politician; at least there is no doubt. — Bangambiki Habyarimana

Truth would quickly cease to be stranger than fiction, once we got as used to it. — H.L. Mencken

We're all odd balls; some people are just better at pretending to be even — Benny Bellamacina

Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try! — Dr. Seuss

The stupidest people suddenly become a little cleverer when we learn that they think well of us — Jude Morgan

Think of me as an impetuous Hegel, drunk with power, and also, regular drunk. — Eugene Mirman

Achieve everything and fail at the rest — Benny Bellamacina

And, drunk with my own madness, I shouted at him furiously, Make life beautiful! Make life beautiful! — Charles Baudelaire

Being a Falconer is about saving the buggers even if they don't deserve it." - Farlan MacNeil — Edwin McRae

Without death Death is dead — Silje Akselberg Iversen

All men have their frailties; and whoever looks for a friend without imperfections, will never find what he seeks. — Cyrus The Great

Especially the transcendental philosophy needs the leaven of humor to render it light and digestible. — Henry David Thoreau

The English winter is long, cold and wet, just like the English summer — Benny Bellamacina

Man craves joy far more than anything else in life, but there is nothing as madly intoxicating as the feeling of joy that comes from the soul. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

Sooner or later everyone behaves badly. Some of us are just better at it than others. — Kim Foster

If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave. — Mo Willems

The pen is mightier than the sword - It's also easier to write with! — Benny Hill

I grew up once, I decided never to do it again — Benny Bellamacina

Once upon a time,
there was a Zen sign
at every small railway crossing in America

Stop. Look. And listen. — Dick Allen

No Matter what you're, Matter is ; What you do. — Harishankar Kaushik

I keep dying and hoping you notice me. But you're too busy living. — F.K. Preston

What if nobody showed up at Armageddon? — C.R. Strahan

Theology, philosophy, metaphysics, and quantum physics are merely ways for God to have his smart people believe in him — Jeremy Aldana

There exists a microscopic breed of brain beetle, commonly known as an 'idea'. An idea desires only one thing: To catch the perfect brain wave. — Leah Broadby

The trouble was that he was talking in philosophy but they were listening in gibberish. — Terry Pratchett

What a paradox it is, the sane causes more problems than the insane! It is! The real problems of the world do not come from the insane but, the sane! — Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

Keep your head high and your skirt down. — Marie Rudisill

Violence can read like poetry. You just have to describe the act as if you're in love with the way your characters bleed. — F.K. Preston

Education is the best gift my parent gave me. — Lailah Gifty Akita

... People who are the spices of this world are the natural souls with instincts and impulses that have not been pruned by evolution and civilization. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

Always stay one step a head, unless you're already there — Benny Bellamacina

If it's taking to long to get up the career ladder, get a career lift. — Benny Bellamacina

I'm not the one going for a biology degree. I'm just a philosophy major who eats people. — Scott Westerfeld

Smartass Disciple: Master, do you really believe in the second chance?
Master of Stupidity: That supports the basis of lost-then-found concept. — Toba Beta

Old age is not just for grown up's — Benny Bellamacina

Sometimes, our pride compels us to engage in costly wars when a true commitment to a compromising peace would have been the best course to pursue. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

People are like pickles- some are sour, some are sweet, and some leave a bad taste in your mouth. — Kallee Gallant

When you're given the gift of truth, you spend a lot of time trying to tone it down because it is already offensive enough. — Shannon L. Alder

Writers are the most tormented of all the different categories of artists that are out there in the world. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

When a man learns to love, he must bear the risk of hatred. — Masashi Kishimoto

Most people have this tendency to make judgments on others based on preconceptions, especially when they are dealing with them for the first time. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando

Brian: I love books
Prof. Morrison: The contents of books, or just owning a whole load of books? — David Nicholls

He who understands philosophy understands laughter. That mysterious Word at the beginning, mentioned in the Bible, is a divine guffaw. — Alejandro Jodorowsky

Pay attention to me. — Sally Quinn

A bunch of bad songs, make an awful whine. — Benny Bellamacina

A man can't talk of true happiness if he has never known true love - the trusting, selfless and unconditional love that I took for granted. — Janvier Chouteu-Chando