Mencia Carlos Quotes: top 44 famous quotes about Mencia Carlos

Mencia Carlos Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Mencia Carlos quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

What I say is stupid. Who takes a comedian seriously? I'm doing sophisticated knock-knock jokes. — Carlos Mencia

America is such a great country, we have fat poor people. — Carlos Mencia

I will do nothing for 89 minutes, but score in the 90th. — George Weah

That's not news! When a shark comes out of the water, walks into a 7-11, and bites you in the ass, then it's news! — Carlos Mencia

Is cruelty still cruel if it is necessary? Is cruelty still cruel if it is part of a lie? — Johnny Rich

I'll know America is in bad shape when Cubans in Miami get in the water and swim back to Cuba. — Carlos Mencia

Strive to enrich all lives, hearts and minds not just your own pockets — Rasheed Ogunlaru

Why are we rebuilding New Orleans? Whose idea was this, Aquaman? — Carlos Mencia

I work out with a trainer, Anna Kaiser, three days a week. — Kelly Ripa

It is never okay to use the toilet with the door open ... I never want to know what comes out of there because sometimes I eat at that restaurant. — Carlos Mencia

Do not encourage my behaviour. — Carlos Mencia

Here, let's go to my dressing room, and I promise, I'll only put it in for a second. — Carlos Mencia

I grew up in the projects and I know how important it is for kids to have hope. — Carlos Mencia

Racism is exclusion, that's why I make fun of everybody. — Carlos Mencia

When white people eat potato chips, they're called white people. When black people eat potato chips, they're called niggas. — Carlos Mencia

I'm not white, I don't apologize for what my country did to become great — Carlos Mencia

When it comes to my daughter, I'm a conservative. But when it comes to your daughter, I'm a liberal! — Carlos Mencia

Christ is risen! There is life, therefore, after death! His resurrection is the symbol and pledge of universal resurrection! — Henry Ward Beecher

We celebrate Labor Day by not going to work? — Carlos Mencia

Like my father I, too, was born in Central America - Nebraska. — Carlos Mencia

Mormons know that it's not enough to practise your religion - you also have to spread your religion. — Jonah Peretti

When women can't climax, it's our fault, but when we can't get an erection, we have to go to the doctor. — Carlos Mencia

I'll admit it, the Holocaust was definitely a bad thing, but do we really need Jewish people around? They have big noses. I said it! I said it! — Carlos Mencia

The job of leadership today is not just to make money, it's to make meaning. — John Seely Brown

If your gonna drop out of school - tough grades are not your goal - then change your name to Candy and learn to work a pole. — Carlos Mencia

We can use all the scientific tools, but it will never replace the palate or the talent of the chefs who are in the kitchen. — Daniel Humm

This will be a new amputation. You've been a part of my flesh, underneath all my skin. Your removal will bleed and leave me lame for a time. — Julie Berry

The essence of what makes life beautiful is the fact that it can go away. — Carlos Mencia

In this moment, there is plenty of time. In this moment, you are precisely as you should be. In this moment, there is infinite possibility. (17) — Victoria Moran

If you aren't laughing, you aren't living! — Carlos Mencia

important and vision is critical, but — Zig Ziglar

Hurricane Katrina was caused by political correctness. I said it! — Carlos Mencia

If you were this fish, would you prefer me to be eating you with sadness or with delight? — Jose Eduardo Agualusa

The problem with the world is there's too many stupid people and nobody to eat them. — Carlos Mencia

If one has made a mistake, and fails to correct it, one has made a greater mistake. — Plato

If God made Adam and Eve, they had children ... wait a minute ... that means someone banged their sister! — Carlos Mencia

When a black person has no electricity, no water, they call it the ghetto. When white people have no electricity and no water, they call it camping. — Carlos Mencia

I'm glad Hurricane Katrina happened. It taught us an important lesson: black people can't swim. — Carlos Mencia

If you ain't laughing, you ain't living, baby. — Carlos Mencia

Know your religion, know who you are and don't be ashamed. — Carlos Mencia

Drawing the desperate and the adrift, Los Angeles has long been the dumping ground of dreams both real and cinematic. — Steve Erickson

God has a sense of humor. If you don't believe me, tomorrow go to wal-mart and just look at people. — Carlos Mencia

Why did the 14-year old Mexican girl end up pregnant? Because her teacher told her to go do an essay. — Carlos Mencia

I'm not overweight. I flucuate between chubby and curvy. — Mindy Kaling