Leckman Quotes: top 65 famous quotes about Leckman

Leckman Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Leckman quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Empolyee form funWho to contact in an emergency?911

Empolyee form fun
Who to contact in an emergency?
911 — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I have always pictured accupuncture like falling into

I have always pictured accupuncture like falling into a box of sewing needles, and then standing up refreshed and free of pain. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I tried to walk a mile in a

I tried to walk a mile in a man's shoes once. I ended up running most of the way!! Seems he wanted them back.. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Remember, never apply too much torque or you'll

Remember, never apply too much torque or you'll bust your nuts!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: They used to say, "A penny for your

They used to say, "A penny for your thoughts". I have heard that zombies will pay up to $5 a pound for your brains. Inflation even affects the dead!!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: While walking with a British coach.Why do you

While walking with a British coach.
Why do you chuckle every time we walk by the theater that is showing "Free Willy"? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: If you sleep with one eye open are

If you sleep with one eye open are your dreams only half as good as everyone elses? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I have my moments, I just can't remember

I have my moments, I just can't remember where I put them. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Some people like to push my buttons!!! I

Some people like to push my buttons!!! I just wish they would give them back ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: A great book is a thing of mystery

A great book is a thing of mystery and beauty; it has the power to move you. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Somebody once told me that I need a

Somebody once told me that I need a reality check, I told them that I'll accept money from any source. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: The man said, "The toy cars are a

The man said, "The toy cars are a dollar a piece". The boy thought about that a moment and asked, "How much for the whole thing? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Never torque a man's nuts unless you are

Never torque a man's nuts unless you are his mechanic!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: How many of you knew what the Thomas

How many of you knew what the Thomas A Swift Electric Rifle was? An idea in the book years ago, and now who hasn't heard of a T.A.S.E.R. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Have you ever found Viking in your cottage

Have you ever found Viking in your cottage cheese? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I always wonder how many potholes there are

I always wonder how many potholes there are in the road less taken. I mean it's great to go where others don't, but is it maintained? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I wonder how much deeper the ocean would

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges soaking up so much water. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: They say that time is relative. I think

They say that time is relative. I think the way it's treating me it's a distant one, maybe a bad uncle, and not welcome in my house this Christmas!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: If a book falls in the woods and

If a book falls in the woods and nobody read it, was it ever written? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I took the road less traveled, now I

I took the road less traveled, now I need a map. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: If I were a candy bar I'd want

If I were a candy bar I'd want to be a snicker, because then I'd have the last laugh!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I took the road less travled, now I'm

I took the road less travled, now I'm lost. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I flunked out of mime school. I could

I flunked out of mime school. I could never hear what the instructor was saying!!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I don't know why they call them Cheerios,

I don't know why they call them Cheerios, I ate an entire box and didn't feel any happier!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: When I was little and my mom got

When I was little and my mom got mad at me she would always say, "You know you can be replaced".
I have often wondered if I was. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: My oldest son used to say his stomach

My oldest son used to say his stomach had angries when he felt sick.
I always pictured an all night fight club for finger foods!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Still waiting for them to make reversible diapers,

Still waiting for them to make reversible diapers, maybe with teflon coating ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I consider whoever my words land on to

I consider whoever my words land on to be my target, that's why I like flash fiction, it's a lot like using a shotgun. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I'm not sure what they mean by mispent

I'm not sure what they mean by mispent youth, I used mine to get a nice BLT a few years ago. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Don't follow your heart if you can't keep

Don't follow your heart if you can't keep a beat — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I never completely understood the phrase, "I took

I never completely understood the phrase, "I took my medicine religiously", unless of course it was a religion I was unfamiliar with!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: We started our journey across the waistlands by

We started our journey across the waistlands by folowing the enormous belt!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: You shouldn't follow your heart unless you can

You shouldn't follow your heart unless you can keep a beat. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: A bird in the hand is worth two

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, unless it is the burning bush, in that case the value of your bird just went up!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I think what I need to do is

I think what I need to do is stay awake while I'm sleeping so I can see what I'm dreaming better!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Thought about being a stand up comedienne for

Thought about being a stand up comedienne for zombies, but when they eat you alive, they really eat you!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: If I have a pocket full of rainbows

If I have a pocket full of rainbows am I an optimist, or a guy with wet pants and really large pockets? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I sprayed my dog with off and he

I sprayed my dog with off and he still sits in my favorite chair!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I've always been afraid that someone would steal

I've always been afraid that someone would steal my identity some day and be more successful at being me than I am!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I am open to all comments, I accept

I am open to all comments, I accept them with humility, or as much as i can muster on short notice. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: They started the meeting out by saying, "Everybody

They started the meeting out by saying, "Everybody please take your seats"
I was halfway back to my cubicle with mine before they stopped me ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Bad questions at employment interviews:Is your drug test

Bad questions at employment interviews:
Is your drug test graded on a curve? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Why is ground round sold in a square

Why is ground round sold in a square package? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: You know what they say. One man's joke

You know what they say. One man's joke is another man's brother — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: They say you don't know what you don't

They say you don't know what you don't know until you know that you don't know it. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: How to contact in case of an emergency?I

How to contact in case of an emergency?
I prefer 911 myself ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Has anyone else noticed that most dreams happen

Has anyone else noticed that most dreams happen while you're asleep? Makes it a lot harder to remember the details ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I woke today ready to think outside the

I woke today ready to think outside the box. I can't remember where I put it. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Is it worth the effort to tell an

Is it worth the effort to tell an idiot that they are profoundly stupid? Or is it just good fun to see the blank stare? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I tok the road less traveled. Now I'm

I tok the road less traveled. Now I'm lost. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: If you die while travelling at the speed

If you die while travelling at the speed of light do you still see the light, or a 'temporarily unavailable' message? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Is it possible to be ticket for going

Is it possible to be ticket for going too fast during speed dating? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Sometimes I wake up and wonder if those

Sometimes I wake up and wonder if those chalk outlines they have at murder scenes get together for holiday parties ... — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Pharmacy drive-up window:"Could I have your address?""Well, you

Pharmacy drive-up window:
"Could I have your address?"
"Well, you could, but that would be one hell of a coincidence!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I think that last batch of sea monkeys

I think that last batch of sea monkeys ate my cat!!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Quickly look down, now you tell me, when

Quickly look down, now you tell me, when you were little did you ever imagine that you'd be wearing those shoes? Mind blowing isn't it? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: How many boxs of Fruit Loops do you

How many boxs of Fruit Loops do you need to smash to be considered a cereal killer? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: How about a TV show about vampire plastic

How about a TV show about vampire plastic surgeons called, "Suck and Tuck"? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: In the form it asked who to contact

In the form it asked who to contact in an emergency, so I put 911. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I admit I once threw caution to the

I admit I once threw caution to the wind ...
It doesn't fly well!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: They kept yelling at me to pay attention

They kept yelling at me to pay attention during school, since education hasn't panned out for me can I get a refund, or at least a rebate? — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: So you like to stretch the truth?" he

So you like to stretch the truth?" he asked me. "Stretch, fold, spindle, staple or cut, whatever it takes to get it to fit just right". — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I am open to comments, I accept with

I am open to comments, I accept with with all humility, or at least what I can muster at short notice. — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: I try not to have personal problems, I

I try not to have personal problems, I do that by telling everyone about them!!! — Neil Leckman

Leckman Quotes By Neil Leckman: Is it worse to double park if you're

Is it worse to double park if you're cross eyed? — Neil Leckman