Laurence Peter Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Laurence Peter
Laurence Peter Quotes & Sayings
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An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
— Laurence J. Peter
Don't knock the rich. When did a poor person give you a job?
— Laurence J. Peter
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
— Laurence J. Peter
When you see yourself quoted in print and you're sorry you said it, it suddenly becomes a misquotation.
— Laurence J. Peter
Poetry is that which is lost in translation.
— Laurence J. Peter
Competition in academia is so vicious because the stakes are so small.
— Laurence J. Peter
Every man serves a useful purpose: a miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.
— Laurence J. Peter
Everyone rises to their level of incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status
— Laurence J. Peter
Aristotle's axiom: The worst form of inequality is to try to make unequal things equal.
— Laurence J. Peter
The modern child will answer you back before you've said anything.
— Laurence J. Peter
In the country of the blind, the one-eyed king can still goof up.
— Laurence J. Peter
The surest sign that you haven't any sense is to argue with one who hasn't.
— Laurence J. Peter
America is a country that doesn't know where it is going but is determined to set a speed record getting there.
— Laurence J. Peter
The seaman tells stories of winds, the ploughman of bulls; the soldier details his wounds, the shepherd his sheep.
— Laurence J. Peter
Marriage is a good deal like taking a bath-not so hot once you get accustomed to it.
— Laurence J. Peter
When in doubt or danger, run in circles, scream and shout.
— Laurence J. Peter
Would the boy you were be proud of the man you are?
— Laurence J. Peter
Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
— Laurence J. Peter
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.
— Laurence J. Peter
Reality is for people who can't face drugs.
— Laurence J. Peter
It's strange that men should take up crime when there are so many legal ways to be dishonest.
— Laurence J. Peter
Lead, follow or get of the way
— Laurence J. Peter
A bore is a person who lights up the room simply by leaving it.
— Laurence J. Peter
Men now monopolize the upper levels ... depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
An employee's relationship - by blood, marriage or acquaintance - with a person above him in the hierarchy.
— Laurence J. Peter
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
— Laurence J. Peter
The advantage of modern means of communication is they enable you to worry about things in all of the world
— Laurence J. Peter
The cave-dweller's wife complained that he hadn't dragged her anywhere in months.
— Laurence J. Peter
A bureaucrat's idea of cleaning up his files is to make a copy of every paper before he destroys it.
— Laurence J. Peter
Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.
— Laurence J. Peter
When I want your opinion I'll give it to you.
— Laurence J. Peter
If you can't keep up, drag them down to your level.
— Laurence J. Peter
A man convinced against his will is not convinced.
— Laurence J. Peter
Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert.
— Laurence J. Peter
Man's First Mistake: The Wheel
— Laurence J. Peter
We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves.
— Laurence J. Peter
May your happiest days of the past be your saddest days of your future.
— Laurence J. Peter
Middle age is when anything new in the way you feel is most likely a symptom.
— Laurence J. Peter
America is a land of taxation that was founded to avoid taxation.
— Laurence J. Peter
Cleaning anything involves making something else dirty, but anything can get dirty without something else getting clean.
— Laurence J. Peter
Slump, and the world slumps with you. Push and you push alone.
— Laurence J. Peter
Do it now. There may be a law against it tomorrow.
— Laurence J. Peter
The great question is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with failure.
— Laurence J. Peter
Nobody can be perfect unless he admits his faults, but if he has faults how can he be perfect?
— Laurence J. Peter
A censor is an expert in cutting remarks. A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
— Laurence J. Peter
Computers can solve all kinds of problems except the unemployment problem they create.
— Laurence J. Peter
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
— Laurence J. Peter
Humility is the embarrassment you feel when you tell people how wonderful you are.
— Laurence J. Peter
Middle age is when the best exercise is one of discretion.
— Laurence J. Peter
If at first you don't succeed, lie, lie again.
— Laurence J. Peter
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.
— Laurence J. Peter
My problem is I say what I'm thinking before I think what I'm saying.
— Laurence J. Peter
They lead only as the carved wooden figurehead leads the ship.
— Laurence J. Peter
The machinery of government is a vast series of interlocking hierarchies riddled through and through with incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
Give a child enough rope and he will trip you up.
— Laurence J. Peter
Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it.
— Laurence J. Peter
There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us.
— Laurence J. Peter
Don't believe in miracles - depend on them.
— Laurence J. Peter
Middle age is when you stop criticizing the older generation and start criticizing the younger one.
— Laurence J. Peter
When a New Yorker looks like he has a suntan, it's probably rust.
— Laurence J. Peter
The unexpected always happens.
— Laurence J. Peter
It is wise to remember that you are one of those who can be fooled some of the time.
— Laurence J. Peter
Many an optimist has become rich simply by buying out a pessimist.
— Laurence J. Peter
Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it.
— Laurence J. Peter
Scientists are still trying to produce life in the laboratory, but it shouldn't be difficult if the laboratory assistant is pretty and willing.
— Laurence J. Peter
He laughs best whose laugh lasts.
— Laurence J. Peter
Before publishers' blurbs were invented, authors had to make their reputations by writing.
— Laurence J. Peter
Egypt: Where the Israelites would still be if Moses had been a bureaucrat.
— Laurence J. Peter
A rut is a grave with the ends knocked out.
— Laurence J. Peter
You shouldn't punish others for your own choices.
— Laurence J. Peter
Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
— Laurence J. Peter
Ignorance is the mother of research.
— Laurence J. Peter
In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.
— Laurence J. Peter
The incompetent with nothing to do can still make a mess of it.
— Laurence J. Peter
An optimist expects his dreams to come true; a pessimist expects his nightmares to.
— Laurence J. Peter
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge of distance.
— Laurence J. Peter
Two things reduce prejudice: education and laughter.
— Laurence J. Peter
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.
— Laurence J. Peter
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
— Laurence J. Peter
Home is where the college student home for the holidays isn't.
— Laurence J. Peter
Many live by their wits but few by their wit.
— Laurence J. Peter
Ignorance once dispelled is difficult to reestablish.
— Laurence J. Peter
A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.
— Laurence J. Peter
A free press is one that prints a dictator's speech but doesn't have to.
— Laurence J. Peter
I inherited my ability from both parents; my mother's ability for spending money, and my father's ability for not earning it.
— Laurence J. Peter
We are members of a strange species that devotes its energies to climbing the ladder of success in order to make money to buy things we don't like.
— Laurence J. Peter
The reason crime doesn't pay is that when it does, it is called a more respectable name.
— Laurence J. Peter
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
Bore : A fellow who can change the subject back to his topic of conversation faster than you can change it back to yours.
— Laurence J. Peter
Many a man, under the old and the new systems, has made the upward step from candidate to legislator, only to achieve his level of incompetence.
— Laurence J. Peter
It usually takes two people to make one of them angry.
— Laurence J. Peter
A lawyer is a man who helps you get what is coming to him.
— Laurence J. Peter
Only mediocrities rise to the top in a system that won't tolerate wave making.
— Laurence J. Peter
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.
— Laurence J. Peter
There is no stigma attached to recognizing a bad decision in time to install a better one.
— Laurence J. Peter
There are some men who in a fifty-fifty proposition insist on getting the hyphen too.
— Laurence J. Peter