Funny Says And Quotes: top 33 famous quotes about Funny Says And

Funny Says And Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Says And quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I stepped away from the wall and tried to put on a happy face. It didn't work. "Hi."
"She says that so well." Mal turned to me and winked. — Kylie Scott

Who says you only get one? If you're lucky, you will meet The One, The Two, The Three ... and so on.
Nesta — Cathy Hopkins

She looks me dead in the face and says, "The safe word is going to be 'immigration,' because you know I'll stop it. — Kayti McGee

I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is "don't tell the butcher"! — Rodney Dangerfield

He says black, I say white and we do grey — Lazaro Hernandez

Alright, manly man," he says. "Go prove that you're a man. — Jessica Sorensen

Any husband who says, "My wife and I are completely equal partners," is talking about either a law firm or a hand of bridge. — Bill Cosby

Everything Will Ferrell says during scenes is so funny and so natural. I was amazed at his genius. — Erick Chavarria

If she says "I love you," and I say "I know," that's beautiful and acceptable and funny. — Chris Taylor

My wife's a loving, funny, Irish-spirited person, and I'm still surprised at some of the things she says. She makes me laugh every day. — Gary Sinise

You're not eating the cheese, Frank says accusingly. And you're fucking my mom, I want to say back. — Lauren Barnholdt

She says screens are the cigarettes of our age. They're toxic, and we're only going to realize the damage they're doing when it's too late. — Sophie Kinsella

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks at them and says: "Is this some kind of a joke?" — Frank Carson

Be the kind of woman who, when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says Oh, no! She's up. — Joanne Clancy

Don't just tell me your brother is funny-show me what he says and does and let me decide whether I want to laugh. — Dennis G. Jerz

Ish #109 If MapQuest says make a right, go straight. You'll get there quicker. — Regina Griffin

I want my online content to be so good that Google's web crawler stops and says "Dayyyum son! — Ryan Lilly

Warren returns from his room and sits back down at the table.
"I walked away for dramatic effect," he says. "I wasn't finished eating yet. — Colleen Hoover

Mr. A calls me into his office and says he's got bad news and bad news, and which do I want first. I say the bad news. — George Saunders

It's funny when someone says to you 'you're hot' and all that, because I don't think of it in that way. — Kate Winslet

She says you're not awake until you're actually out of bed and standing up. — Richelle Mead

A guy walks into a pub with a lump of asphalt on His shoulder, He says to the bar man give us a pint and one for the road. — Tommy Cooper

So this bloke says to me, "Can I come in your house and talk about your carpets?" I thought "That's all I need, a Je-hoover's witness". — Tim Vine

Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it. — Dave Chappelle

I thought she liked you now. I've seen her kiss you and she says your name the special way she says Rina's and mine - like it tastes good. — Deborah Hale

Ben walks in the room and asks, "What were you guys doing?" Nikki says "Nothing" at the same time I say, "Your sister and I were just makin' out. — Simone Elkeles

A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?" "No" says the cop. "What about all these other cars?" "They didn't ask!" — Henny Youngman

I roofied you because I wanted you naked ... and afraid, Tyler says again in a sinister voice — Tara Sivec

Jenna, standing in the doorway with her mouth and hand full of shelled pistachios, says, 'Real' is a dirty word in this place'. — Lauren DeStefano

It's all about one split-second. Boxing is a funny thing. You blink your eyes and somebody says good night to you. — Kostya Tszyu

The Bible talks about building houses on sand and rock, but says nothing about a brick house built on a blanket. — Nicole McKay

Girls, if a boy says something that isn't funny, you don't have to laugh. — Amy Poehler

Like the NRA says, it's better to have a machine gun and not need it than to need a machine gun and not have it. — John Sandford