Funny Case Quotes
Collection of top 30 famous quotes about Funny Case
Funny Case Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Case quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I don't believe in an afterlife, but I'm taking an extra pair of underwear just in case.
— Woody Allen
I feel pretty sure I know why the dinosaurs went extinct. They were waiting for Sam to pick out a cell phone case.
— P. Anastasia
One should never give up on hope. Unless that's the name of the girl who cheated on you in which case, yeah, give her up.
— Carroll Bryant
I never practice my guitar. From time to time I just open the case & throw in a piece of raw meat.
— Wes Montgomery
Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator.
— Lemony Snicket
Whatever you have read I have said is almost certainly untrue, except if it is funny, in which case I definitely said it.
— Tallulah Bankhead
Remember, I have a Ph.D. in English literature.
— Henry Louis Gates
I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.
— Rodney Dangerfield
People want me to be funny all the time. They think I'm being funny no matter what I say or do and that's not the case.
— Christopher Guest
For all I know, my grandfather was a bank robber in Kilsyth.
— Peter Capaldi
Pause while reading a book only in case of two things:1. To kiss
2. To sip coffee
Too bad both are a luxury. — Saleem Sharma
Flattery is a counterfeit money which, but for vanity, would have no circulation.
— Francois De La Rochefoucauld
Science may carry us to Mars, but it will leave the earth peopled as ever by the inept.
— Agnes Repplier
Someone once said writing and gardening are similar pursuits. Tell you what, I'd have one fucked up garden if that were the case.
— Carla H. Krueger
I've got a wallet, it's orange. In case I wanna buy a deer. That doesn't make any sense at all.
— Mitch Hedberg
Why are you wearing a T-shirt under your other T-shirt?" Livvy asked."In case one of them is stolen," Marked said, as it were entirely normal. — Cassandra Clare
I had heard of offices feeling like prisons, but in this case our prison felt, rather anticlimactically, like an office.
— William Ritter
I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.
— Rodney Dangerfield
As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.
— Groucho Marx
It sometimes takes days, even weeks, before a dog's nerves tire. In the case of terriers it can run into months.
— E.B. White
Job was what you'd technically describe as a loony.
— Peter Cook
I was beginning to think that Simon just had a bad case of OCD, ADD, and PMS. With a little BS and OMG mixed in.
— Dannika Dark
Airline hostesses show you how to use a seatbelt in case you haven't been in a car since 1965.
— Jerry Seinfeld
The earliest full-length account of a chariot race appears in Book xxiii of the Iliad.
— Richard Arnold Epstein