Funny Burns Quotes: top 20 famous quotes about Funny Burns

Funny Burns Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Burns quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

You'll be fine, just some minor burns and hypothermia, which was kind of hard to explain. — Kiersten White

I must be getting absent-minded. Whenever I complain that things aren't what they used to be, I always forget to include myself. — George Burns

I worried about playing God (in the movie Oh God). We're about the same age, but we grew up in different neighborhoods. — George Burns

The earth has become one big village, with telephones laid on from one end to the other, and air transport, both speedy and safe. — Wyndham Lewis

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday. — George Burns

Leonard had let them go alone with the young boy who Ali was now convinced, was a couple falafel's short of a picnic — L.R. Currell

Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook. — Bill Cosby

She didn't need to go to acting school to learn that the essence of acting is to act like you're not acting. — George Burns

Paddy was in the delivery room when the midwife handed him a black baby. "Is this yours?" she asked "probably" said Paddy "she burns everything else" — Billy Connolly

We may not understand His Will for us in time, but in eternity the veil will be drawn and we shall see that He acted only for our happiness. — Rose Philippine Duchesne

Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there. — George Burns

In those days the best painkiller was ice; it wasn't addictive and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. — George Burns

My idea of working for a living is not going to office and earning a salary. It is to build a log house and catch my own fish and till some soil. — Girish Kohli

Keep quiet about a toothpick in today's butter and next thing you know you'll be findin' a doorknob in the cottage cheese. — Alan Bradley

I don't have a drinking problem. I drink. I get drunk. I fall down, no problem. — George Burns

Sometimes I think I look like I've had facial reconstructive surgery. Like after burns. — Robert Pattinson

Marsala isn't the one that's going to keep you and Chansey apart. It's you. — Georgia Cates

When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.' — George Burns

How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything. — George Burns

Mistakes are made move on — NightBits