Funny Better Than Quotes: top 41 famous quotes about Funny Better Than

Funny Better Than Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Better Than quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Don't put your wand there, boy! ... Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know! — J.K. Rowling

Mick Jagger is in better shape than far too many NBA players. It's up in the air whether the same can be said of Keith Richards. — Bill Walton

A ham sandwich is better than nothing. Nothing is better than eternal happiness. So eternal happiness is beaten by a ham sandwich. — Mark Forsyth

It's funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source. — Ellen DeGeneres

If You Lose Your Keys, At Least It's Better Than Losing Your Car. — Edward Harris

A bank book makes good reading - better than some novels. — Sir Harry Lauder

You should get a better boyfriend. One with an IQ higher than a turnip. — Robyn Carr

Allen's Law of Civilization: It is better for civilization to be going down the drain than to be coming up it. — Paul Dickson

Because of acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine. — Mitch Hedberg

Nerd life is just so much better than regular life. — John Green

It's funny how dogs and cats know the inside of folks better than other folks do, isn't it? — Eleanor Porter

It's funny how this total stranger could relate to me better than anyone else I'd ever met. It was as if I'd known her my entire life. — Fisher Amelie

Ugliness is better than beauty. It lasts longer and in the end, gravity will get us all. — Johnny Depp

My father was funnier than me. My father was Richard Pryor-funny. I'm just a better businessman. — Tracy Morgan

That's the problem with best friends. Sometimes they know you better than you know yourself. — Cecily Von Ziegesar

Life is better than death, I believe, if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it. — Alice Walker

It's better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money. — P. J. O'Rourke

Being sued by your own record company, that's even better than receiving a Grammy — Neil Young

With one out in the first, Dave Roberts looks a lot better than the last time he pitched against the Padres! — Jerry Coleman

Always telling the truth is no doubt better than always lying, although equally pathological. — Robert Breault

The funny thing about life is, there's nothing better to do than live it. — D.E. Navarro

No sex is better than bad sex. — Germaine Greer

Even hating myself I still think I'm better than you. — Stephen Schneider

Most man can think no better than a child! This fact perfectly explains why there are so many funny beliefs! — Mehmet Murat Ildan

The truth is funny. Honest discovery, observation, and reaction is better than contrived invention. — Del Close

We didn't underestimate them. They were just a lot better than we thought. — Bobby Robson

I have a feeling that we are doing better in the war than the people have been told. — Ronald Reagan

It is better to give than to receive." - Liars — Ellen DeGeneres

Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue. — Moby

Now I am shut up with his mother on Bramble farm and she is no better for conversation than prune whip — Sandra Dallas

I always chose all my friends on whether they were funny. What's a better way to pass the time than laughing or smiling? — Ricky Gervais

Better a bald head than none at all. — Austin O'Malley

They told me I've got writer's cramp. So is that better than the block? — Joyce Rachelle

Better to have to retrace your steps and then move forward than never to move forward at all. — Anne Burack Sayre

Self-knowledge is better than self-control any day," Raquel said firmly. "And I know myself well enough to know how I act around cookies. — Claudia Gray

I used to laugh at that old wheeze about a man wanting his son to be better than he was, but as I get older it seems less funny and more true. — Stephen King

There's no better friend than a sister ... — Mary Engelbreit

The worst reconciliation is better than the best divorce. — Miguel De Cervantes

The funny thing is, I was never much of a fighter. Better a live coward than a dead hero, that was my motto. — Ozzy Osbourne

By the way, I'm funniest when I'm not being funny. I'm better to laugh at than with, pretty much. — Jemima Kirke

Like the NRA says, it's better to have a machine gun and not need it than to need a machine gun and not have it. — John Sandford