Frank Funny Quotes: top 47 famous quotes about Frank Funny

Frank Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Frank Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

What's the difference between a Rottweiler and a poodle peeing on your leg? You let the Rottweiler finish. — Frank Carson

-Am I allowed to call you Grayson, or have you assumed a new identity as well?
-He's Frank. — Jen Turano

I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle." — Frank Carson

Doctor told me I've got two weeks to live. I said: "Can I have the last week in July and the 1st week in August?" — Frank Carson

Dreams are funny things. They shift and morph the more you grow. — Ella Frank

There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: "You can't eat your own food in here." So they swapped sandwiches. — Frank Carson

Bob Dole used to be really funny. Barney Frank can be kind of funny. Bob Kerrey has a good sense of humor. — Al Franken

Funny how something that seemed so insignificant, just an old bowl with faded glazed stripes, could trigger so many memories. — Dorothea Benton Frank

The dumbest question I was ever asked by a sportswriter was whether I hit harder with red or white gloves. As a matter of fact, I hit harder with red. — Frank Crawford

Straight, huh? You know, funny thing is, often the straightest of trees have crooked roots. — Ella Frank

I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man. — Frank Carson

Did you know you can have an Irish abortion, but there is a 12 month waiting list? — Frank Carson

My wife went into the butchers and said: "You've a sheep's head in your window." The butcher said: "That's a mirror." — Frank Carson

I don't think of myself as being funny. But life takes strange turns. — Frank Gorshin

A man up in front of a judge says "I don't recognise this court." "Why not?" "It's been redecorated since the last time I was here." — Frank Carson

An Irishman's wife gave birth to twins. Her husband wanted to know who the other man was. — Frank Carson

No, I don't like you, I just thought you were cute enough to kiss you. — Frank Ocean

Boxing's all about getting the job done as quickly as possible, whether it takes 10 or 15 or 20 rounds. — Frank Bruno

I'm staying in a lovely hotel, dressing robe behind the door, lovely fluffy sheets - took me a half an hour getting my suitcase closed. — Frank Carson

My mother was against me being an actress - until I introduced her to Frank Sinatra. — Angie Dickinson

boys, girls and music . . why do they need gin? — Frank

You are amazing," she said. "And you make a very handsome elephant. — Rick Riordan

I can't stay mad at Pope Frank. I just can't. It's a funny situation that I like the pope and Mel Gibson doesn't. — Bill Maher

I asked a shop owner if he could help me out. He said: "What way did you come in?" — Frank Carson

Young Frank Pastore may have pitched the biggest victory of 1979. Maybe the biggest victory of the year! — Jerry Coleman

A man says to his mate: "My wife is a twin." His mate says, "How do you tell them apart?" The man says: "Her brother has a beard." — Frank Carson

If you really love guitar, you're going to spend every waking hour stroking the thing. — Frank Zappa

He can't get broke so long as he is stuffed with money. — L. Frank Baum

How very wet this water is. — L. Frank Baum

TV is chewing gum for the eyes. — Frank Lloyd Wright

The Irish Six Million Dollar man only cost three quid. — Frank Carson

Men only go for skinny women because they're too weak to argue - and salads are cheap. — Frank Carson

Toto was not gray; he was a little black dog, with long silky hair and small black eyes that twinkled merrily on either side of his funny, wee nose. — L. Frank Baum

Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up. — Frank Zappa

My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon. — Frank Carson

I have a pacemaker in, but it doesn't work very well, because every time I fart the garage door opens. — Frank Carson

The art of living. Isn't that a funny expression? — Anne Frank

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks at them and says: "Is this some kind of a joke?" — Frank Carson

I start laughing. You have to laugh. Life is just funny sometimes. As long as you remember. — E.R. Frank

I honestly thought my marriage would work because me and the wife did share a sense of humour. We had to really, because she didn't have one. — Frank Skinner

He is my dog, Toto," answered Dorothy.
"Is he made of tin, or stuffed?" asked the Lion.
"Neither. He's a
a
a meat dog," said the girl. — L. Frank Baum

I gave my wife a kiss this morning. She jumped out of bed and did a lap of honour. — Frank Carson

Richard Burton had a tremendous passion for the English language, especially the spoken and written word — Frank Bough

I come from a family of musicians. Even the sewing machine is a Singer. — Frank Carson

My Irish mate told me, if you file down the edges of a 50 pence piece, you can use it as a 10p. — Frank Carson

You're not eating the cheese, Frank says accusingly. And you're fucking my mom, I want to say back. — Lauren Barnholdt

Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny. — Frank Zappa