Food And Humor Quotes: top 52 famous quotes about Food And Humor

Food And Humor Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Food And Humor quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

A tiger only needs three things to be comfortable. Lots of food, sleep, and ... actually, no it's just those two things. — Colleen Houck

'There's a seagull eating our food,' he told me, and it was the most romantic thing I'd ever heard. — T.J. Klune

Even I realized that money was to politicians what the eucalyptus tree is to koala bears: food, water, shelter, and something to crap on. — P. J. O'Rourke

My favorite sport is female and my favorite food is beer. — Glen Cook

One day, and it may be long off, but one day there will be bacon again. It might be mouse bacon, but that will do for me. — Frank Tayell

There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: "You can't eat your own food in here." So they swapped sandwiches. — Frank Carson

I'm gonna take a patato chip! AND eat it! — Tsugumi Ohba

Well if this is really happening, and this psycho really did kidnap us, I want food. — L. Taylor

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. — Kelli Jae Baeli

Stop fretting and eat your Madeira Cake.. — Diane Samuels

The French have the right respect for dogs
in France we chiens get to go to lunch and dinner anytime, anywhere. — Sheron Long

When they figure out how to bottle up orgasms and sell them as a food additive, I'll be first in line. — Nenia Campbell

Stocks may come and stocks may go, but food goes on forever. — Beatrice Fairfax

When he heard there was nothing to eat, he sat down and wept ... "Why did I ever wake up!" he cried. — J.R.R. Tolkien

Henry held up his taco- formerly Vlad's- and grinned. " Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius."
pg248 Henry to Vlad & Joss — Heather Brewer

Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults. — Mitch Hedberg

Love is a banana. First you peel it, and then you roll on the condom. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

My heart is a Latin American food stall and your love is a health inspector from Zurich. — Tom Robbins

If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home. — James A. Michener

One time, I went to a restaurant and I asked the waiter for some food for thought. He left, came back, and tried shoving a sirloin in my ear. — Travis J. Dahnke

The room looks as if a giant dog after a large lunch of food, socks, paints, trousers and pencils, walked into that room and vomited everywhere. — Barbara Kingsolver

Silas consumed only one food, and it was not bananas. — Neil Gaiman

Just eat some chex mix and have a glass of milk and you'll be fine. — Caleb Eversole

I have a friend who is a funny cook. Her food tastes funny and smells funny — Haresh Daswani

Why do Jesus and Mary only appear on Mexican food? Huh? Answer me that? Nobody ever sees the face of God in a California roll. — Ken O'Neill

Heifer."
"Rich man's whore!"
"At least mine can cook the food he eats. And replaces it, too."
"Now see, Dee-Ann Smith. That was just mean! — Shelly Laurenston

Food," I suggested. "Sleep. That's what I need. To get the hell away from here."
Cole frowned at me, as if I'd suggested "ducks" and "yoga". — Maggie Stiefvater

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. — Alex Levine

I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regretted
most of them, but never the potatoes that went with them. — Nora Ephron

Sexual reproduction and food -- humans' two favorite subjects. — Melissa Landers

I'm a simple man. I like pretty dark-haired women and breakfast food. — Ron Swanson

She asked if I loved another woman, so I answered honestly and said, Dinner was great, but I could go for dessert. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

I pat her on the head. "Oh, naive little Kitten. Dear, foolish girl. This cookie is worth all this and more. Sit or you will not partake. — Jenny Han

Where I come from, we're more about efficiency,' he replies. 'A knife like this'll skewer food, smear butter, and slit throats all at the same time. — Marie Lu

He swallowed his food this time and actually spoke instead of humphing, — Elle Klass

I went to the kitchen and felt-up the turkey. — Charles Bukowski

She searched for something to say, something that would make the world a little less dark and scary for him.
'Pop-Tart?' she offered. — Stephenie Meyer

There's nothing good about diversity, other than the food, and we don't need 128 million Mexicans for the restaurants. — Ann Coulter

This is our life now: slaving away in thankless, monotonous jobs and spending half our salaries on fattening food. — Katrina Ramos Atienza

I like rice. Rice is great if you're hungry and want 2000 of something. — Mich Ehrenborg

Mrs. Chandler shouted after us, And I hope that was all-natural food coloring you put on my dog! — Lisa Lutz

Everybody, even those that don't like Chinese food, knew that you had to eat the cookie for the fortune to come true. And so he did. — Justin Swapp

Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing. — Joss Whedon

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt. — Scott Adams

College is a different scene than it was ten years ago. It used to be all about sex and drugs. Now it's all about texting and fast food. — Aaron B. Powell

Prosperity consists of two things: tea after a meal, and a cigarette after tea. — Marjane Satrapi

If you want to keep people happy, just keep the food and entertainment rolling. — E.A. Bucchianeri

Bein' rich is having leftovers. Good leftovers make yo' tongue fly outta yo' mouth and smack yo' brains out. — Paula H. Deen

Is food a substitute for love? No, love is a substitute for food. And a pretty poor substitute at that. — Rohan Candappa

Get out of bed and feed me already, person! — Rachel Cohn

So I didn't have time to craft artful lies and evasions even if I'd wanted to. — Anthony Bourdain

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. — Charles M. Schulz