Family Humor Quotes
Collection of top 100 famous quotes about Family Humor
Family Humor Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Family Humor quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
We should all just face reality and stop taking our meals together.
— Jonathan Tropper
Isn't reality based on the prevailing culture, the trend that people want to identify with?
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Some people live their memorable years fighting against their basic instincts only to succumb in the end to what was actually good for them.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
We, humans, have come up with so many superficialities that are completely unnecessary for our existence and happiness on earth.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Another family crisis: The rabbit goes blind.
— Jacob M. Appel
We goan start promptly at seven o'clock, so be sure to take care of all your bodily needs and functions before we get started.
— Charmaine T. Davis
We love out of compassion, passion or a sense of commitment.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Prospero the Enchanter's immediate reaction upon meeting his daughter is a simple declaration of: Well, fuck.
— Erin Morgenstern
The trouble with cousins, Lizabeth thought, was that they knew all about you, even your allergies.
— Erika Tamar
Sometimes, though, you have to do things for family, even if you'd rather not.
— Patricia C. Wrede
With true love, you can move mountains, make unusual sacrifices, live a life of deprivations and still be happy.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
My brother got shot three times two months ago, and he didn't get the fever." "I bet your family gets shot at a lot, huh? — Shelly Laurenston
When somebody you love dies, a phase of life's innocence dies with that person, and a part of you dies as well.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Fiction is the poor persons travel agent.
— L.Douglas Muncy
If you have to explain your sense of humor, then you are performing for the wrong crowd.
— Shannon L. Alder
What a strange family you are! Is your name Lettie too?
— Diana Wynne Jones
My family has been amazing, and they understand how blessed I am. They've been able to keep my sense of humor.
— Karen Duffy
The best way to learn Japanese is to be born as a Japanese baby, in Japan, raised by a Japanese family.
— Dave Barry
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.
— George Bernard Shaw
Adoption is the most intentional process on Earth.
— Jody Cantrell Dyer
Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together.
— Sam Levenson
To begin with, I dined there on Monday, and once a week is quite enough to dine with one's own relations.
— Oscar Wilde
Gran follows recipes by looking at picture - to the eye, delicious; to the tongue, boiled socks. Makes you wanna cry really.
— Simon Cheshire
There was an omnivorous intellect that won him the family sobriquet of Walking Encyclopedia.
— Eric Liu
A whore Ailean may have been, but a loving, caring whore who adored his offspring and mate.
— G.A. Aiken
Man craves joy far more than anything else in life, but there is nothing as madly intoxicating as the feeling of joy that comes from the soul.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
In the end, we all die for what we believe in... mostly because we all die.
— Nazareth Bergeron
There was pie on the table when Tugs returned. Pie in the Button family meant trouble.
— Anne Ylvisaker
Momma always said when Randy got an idea in his head it was more likely to come attached to a foot in his ass than a check in the bank.
— Joe Schwartz
Life is a mighty joke that is not meant to be funny.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree ... unless that tree's growing on top of a hill.
— John DePrey
There is no bigger gratification than the realization of the things you believe in after overcoming all the odds.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Haylee shook her head as soon as they were gone. Christ, how can our family be mankind's best hope?
— Natasha Larry
My son is 21. He'll be 22 if I let him.
— Henny Youngman
I think part of being a parent is trying to kill your kids.
— Stephen King
Everything's temporary...until it's not.
— Renata Suerth
Wouldn't it be great if life was only Legos? If we could give our kids the right, simple building blocks?
— Chris Bent
Beer is a good family drink.
— Lydia Maria Francis Child
Good grief. They're like the freaking poster family for the NRA.
— Elisabeth Wheatley
Honestly, you needn't think it's easy to be the "badly brought up" central figure of a hypocritical family in hiding.
— Anne Frank
In today's world, human desires far supersede human needs. Waste, as you can see, is the result of that disparity.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
By the time we get to church, I need church cuz I've been yelled at by everyone in the family.
— Jeff Foxworthy
Who wants avocado?
— Wendy Lustbader
![Family Humor Quotes By Marco Roth: When he picked out the [gravesite] plot, my](https://www.wisefamousquotes.com/images/family-humor-quotes-by-marco-roth-732476.jpg "Family Humor Quotes By Marco Roth: When he picked out the [gravesite] plot, my")
When he picked out the [gravesite] plot, my father had joked that he was moving, at last, to the suburbs.
— Marco Roth
We always emerge from the death of a loved one like a phoenix arising from its funeral pyre.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
I Have Fought the Good Fight and Won
— Carmen J. Viglucci
Donit kill her now, just when we've gone to all that trouble to rescue her, said Jeffrey.
— Jeanne Birdsall
Perhaps fate has a way of turning things around and making something good out of the action of someone who failed humanity without meaning to.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.
— Mike Birbiglia
Writers are the most tormented of all the different categories of artists that are out there in the world.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
And like most big families, they were loud and secretly thought they were funnier and a little more special than everyone else.
— Jennifer Close
Infant wart hogs resemble both sides of the family.
— Will Cuppy
... People who are the spices of this world are the natural souls with instincts and impulses that have not been pruned by evolution and civilization.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is.
— Ellen DeGeneres
Sometimes, our pride compels us to engage in costly wars when a true commitment to a compromising peace would have been the best course to pursue.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Violence can read like poetry. You just have to describe the act as if you're in love with the way your characters bleed.
— F.K. Preston
Fat people are funny ... until obesity pays your loved one a visit.
— Mokokoma Mokhonoana
At first I didn't believe in women and unicorns but that was before I knew about the power of chick stuff and before I knew Vageena Hertz.
— Peter Griffin
My dark comic edge is the end result of trying to use humor to maintain my sanity growing up in a dysfunctional family in Honolulu.
— Kirby Wright
My cousin is gay, I always tell him that in our family tree, he's in the fruit section.
— Rodney Dangerfield
You set fire to my house, killed my family, and ate my dog. But steal my boyfriend? That's a step too far.
— Libba Bray
It's in a can. It's good forever.
— Renata Suerth
Most people have this tendency to make judgments on others based on preconceptions, especially when they are dealing with them for the first time.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
God gives us relatives; thank God, we can choose our friends.
— Addison Mizner
I love dark humor that crosses the line and makes you say, 'That's so wrong!' And that's 'Family Guy' to me.
— Elena Satine
I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.
— Bill Watterson
The selfish and self-centered have a hard time being kind, even though you and I know that kindness is a source of relief to the soul.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
There's life after divorce, Sarah,' my father proclaimed, not that he'd ever been divorced.
— Claire Cook
We are, in the comics, the last frontier of good, wholesome family humor and entertainment.
— Bil Keane
My family were hitters. If you made them laugh, they didn't hit you. My dad wouldn't hit me if I got him with humor right between the eyes.
— Roseanne Barr
A man can't talk of true happiness if he has never known true love - the trusting, selfless and unconditional love that I took for granted.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
Nona was as wacky as they came.
— Holly Hood
I think we should wean Grandma.
— Renata Suerth
