Best Gilbert Gottfried Quotes
Collection of top 32 famous quotes about Best Gilbert Gottfried
Best Gilbert Gottfried Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Best Gilbert Gottfried quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I'm a very anti-vacation person. Because I'm always getting on planes for work, to me, a vacation is when I don't have to get on a plane.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I'm known for my slightly inappropriate remarks.
— Gilbert Gottfried
Reality TV has totally destroyed soap operas. They're gone. They used to be the biggest thing in the world - they're gone.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I personally think Miles Davis is a lot funnier than me. And he's working more.
— Gilbert Gottfried
If someone says that I'm the best at anything, I always just agree with them. I'm certainly not gonna argue.
— Gilbert Gottfried
There definitely is exposure in reality shows, but the exposure will basically get you more reality shows.
— Gilbert Gottfried
Nothing can help my comedy.
— Gilbert Gottfried
Japan is really advanced. They don't go to the beach. The beach comes to them.
— Gilbert Gottfried
You never know what people will choose to be offended by.
— Gilbert Gottfried
In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.
— Gilbert Gottfried
R2D2 has gotten more work since "Star Wars" than Carrie Fisher
— Gilbert Gottfried
Off-camera, I sound like Perry Como.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I'd like to have a kid, but I'd probably get a Frank Sinatra Jr. instead of a Gilbert Gottfried Jr. I'd totally screw up like that.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I'd make Jack Benny look like a philanthropist.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I think a lot of people have too much time on their hands.
— Gilbert Gottfried
If you're anything like me, I feel sorry for your friends and family.
— Gilbert Gottfried
The joy of the roasts is to watch people get hurt and offended, and then have to laugh to pretend they're a good sport.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I can't even find someone for a platonic relationship, much less the kind where someone wants to see me naked.
— Gilbert Gottfried
There are certain things I don't want to joke about. If it's about somebody else, it's fine. If it's about me, I think it's totally insensitive!
— Gilbert Gottfried
If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.
— Gilbert Gottfried
The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I've done a lot of Fox shows since then - Married with Children, Living Single and a whole bunch of other Fox things.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.
— Gilbert Gottfried
Any misfortune that happens to another person is funny. If it happens to someone else and not me, it's very funny.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I just split up with my girlfriend, but like the Japanese say, 'They'll be another one floating by any minute now.'
— Gilbert Gottfried
I changed the face of comedy. I used to be funny.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I just don't accept midgets as human beings. There's only so much political correctness I can accept.
— Gilbert Gottfried
Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.
— Gilbert Gottfried
I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things.
— Gilbert Gottfried
