Karl Pilkington Quotes
Top 100 wise famous quotes and sayings by Karl Pilkington
Karl Pilkington Famous Quotes & Sayings
Discover top inspirational quotes from Karl Pilkington on Wise Famous Quotes.
This is the problem with over-crowded inner-city schools there aren't enough parts for everyone in the nativity story.
Kids are like farts in that way. They never seem to bother the owner as much as they bother everyone else.
[Jellyfish] are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful.
I don't really like surprises. Not big ones anyway. Just having a pack of Revels holds enough of a surprise for me.
I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.
I never buy a piece of art. I don't see the point in buying something because I know my eyes will get bored of it eventually.
If you'd have told me five years ago that I'd have done all this - two books, some television and everything - I'd panic, I'd be scared.
Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good.
If you don't sleep you get run down. Sloths never get a flu, cos its good innit thats when your body's replemishing
I don't know what I'm meant to do. I'm not important, am I? I'm not doing anything that makes a difference.
I'd heard street food was a big thing here in Mexico but I didn't think it meant the creatures that lived on the street.
Honestly, all the trouble Noah went to saving the animals two by two and now we're making handbags out of them. I
Well I'm trying to think what I put in ... I think I put in 'why?' to see if I'd confuse the computer.
I don't know why small chocolates are called fun-sized; I mean, if I called a midget fun-sized, they'd kick off.
With evolution, things are always changing, so I sort of think: Should we all be growing three heads?
By 78 you've done everything you're going to do. If you haven't bungee-jumped by the time you're 78 you're not going to do it.
Me in a one-man tent crouching over carrier bag. It's not just the lowest point of the trip. It's the lowest point ever. In 38 years.
I know who I am. Bloody hell, I'm getting enough bills for Karl Pilkington so I hope I am him, 'cos if I'm not, I have no idea who I'm paying for.
People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?
A single vision is more perfect than a committee vision because with everyone having their say, it becomes compromised.
Being honest with you, it's not the 'great' wall of China. It's an all right wall. It's the 'All Right Wall of China.'
We came from the sea originally, now we're going back in it. Don't go in it, unless you're in a boat.
Well ... like, when you're born, you're a little baby, you're wrinkly and stuff, when you get older you sort of morph into a baby again ...
When i was younger i remember once i went to bed and i was so happy that i laughed myself to sleep ...
The great pyramid is overrated. It's a bad design. The lounge is going to be huge, but the bedroom is going to be tiny.
It's like there's some unwritten rule that if you're mates, you can say what you want to each other, and you don't really get that annoyed about it.
The cafe was called Tattoos. The fella who owned it didn't have any tattoos ... but we never saw his wife.
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
the bus was running late, but in truth this was no surprise. Delhi probably got its name from the word 'delay'.
I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax.
Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out.
The Chichen Itza is just a pyramid with four sides, with stairs on each side leading to some kind of bungalow on the top.
What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that.