Offerman Quotes: top 89 famous quotes about Offerman

Offerman Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Offerman quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

The quest for the next key art awards begins with tomorrow's hangover — Nick Offerman

I'm very hairy, and men in film and TV are no longer allowed to be hairy. — Nick Offerman

Instead of playing Draw Something, fucking draw something — Nick Offerman

When I first met with agents, they said, "Okay, you're going to play plumbers and mechanics and bus drivers and farmers. Go." — Nick Offerman

My education began in theater school, and it continues to this day. I just continued learning to be a better performer. — Nick Offerman

Shut your damn mouth. — Nick Offerman

If you don't look at yourself and evaluate it, you instead see how the world's reacting to it. — Nick Offerman

I come from the theater, where I got into acting because I love transforming. I love nothing more than to be unrecognizable. — Nick Offerman

No one will ever ask me to sing because it's beautiful. My secret is hiding my musicianship behind humor. — Nick Offerman

Branding is quite an important thing. As an artist, you want to be able to explore facets of yourself. — Nick Offerman

The fact that I have a job that people even watch is an incredible gift. — Nick Offerman

I grew up among farmers in Illinois and so you always have to have the tools you might need in the eventuality of a flat tire or a broken window. — Nick Offerman

If you like comedy, go home and curl up with Leviticus. The writers of The Onion are handed Leviticus on their first day. — Nick Offerman

Don't use barbiturates before going on stage. And be honest. — Nick Offerman

Really, all religious teachings can be boiled down to: Just be cool. Don't be an asshole. — Nick Offerman

If properly dried and trimmed, New York-style pizza could be used to make a box for Chicago-style pizza. — Nick Offerman

I really thought that I'd be doing Shakespeare, honest to God. I did not foresee the whole action television thing. That was God's joke. — Nick Offerman

Nick Offerman is my hero. He just cracks me up. He's so funny, but he's a true actor, too - he's bringing so much when he's onscreen. — Chris Pratt

When I got my job on 'Parks,' it was so dreamy, kind of unfathomable. I didn't think a job that excellent could exist for me. — Nick Offerman

Technically, we're all half centaur. — Nick Offerman

I like to play women who are not strong at all, because, there's certainly plenty of myself that is no kind of a warrior. — Nick Offerman

I spent a lot of my youth working outside in the elements, and I kind of revel in defeating tough weather. — Nick Offerman

I think that laziness in many ways is the human condition, and that's what has led us to this place where, as we've developed technology. — Nick Offerman

I would like Americans to make things with their hands. Thomas Jefferson and I feel that makes for a much stronger nation. — Nick Offerman

A lot of people find themselves in the entertainment business - or perhaps society steers them toward it - because they're beautiful. — Nick Offerman

I think that purity creates not only a higher level of artistic vision but a purer work ethic. — Nick Offerman

We realized that the world of popular culture had been creating the perfect candidate for many years: the female champion of the universe. — Nick Offerman

The key lies in finding the delicious flavorings in one's life, no matter how fancy your blue jeans may or may not be. — Nick Offerman

Actually, I'm not super-kickass at a lot of things. — Nick Offerman

I have a wonderfully hedonistic appetite, and if I wasn't really strict with myself, I'd weigh 300 pounds. I'm not good with moderation. — Nick Offerman

When things get bad enough, all you can do is laugh. — Nick Offerman

Damn it all, you have been given a life on this beautiful planet! Get off your ass and do something! — Nick Offerman

I awaken. I consume oxygen, then bacon, eggs and black coffee, then my wife, then bacon. — Nick Offerman

Whatever it is you like to do, that's the sexiest part of you. — Nick Offerman

There's a lot of common sense ... which I feel like we have lost touch with. — Nick Offerman

You know, it's hard to beat bacon at anytime of day. But I also am a big fan of corned beef hash. — Nick Offerman

I always call myself a "student" of the guitar. — Nick Offerman

I've been working steadily as an actor since around 1998. I wasn't well known in the public, but I was a dependable working journeyman. — Nick Offerman

My career is inexplicable to me. So far I've just been not getting fired despite being myself. — Nick Offerman

When I got to Los Angeles, I started building cabins in peoples' yards, building post-and-beam structures and cutting the joinery for those. — Nick Offerman

Just stand up for your principals and be loyal to your friends and family. — Nick Offerman

If I put down my tweeter machine for a minute, I actually can communicate with people. As an aside, astonishingly, I just started doing Twitter. — Nick Offerman

I'm quite excited to not play a Xena type character - it's probably closer to me than any character I've ever played. — Nick Offerman

No matter how you decide to spend a little more time on your gestures of giving, the point is just quite simply that you do. — Nick Offerman

but, like an alcoholic or a fan of the Dave Matthews Band, he ultimately couldn't control his self-destructive addiction. — Nick Offerman

I've had to learn and discipline myself that I'm much happier and much less depressed if I give myself a project. It's just that simple. — Nick Offerman

I am a saxophone player. — Nick Offerman

Theater, to me, is always a bigger turn on than film. It's alive. — Nick Offerman

Being a man of the theater and a hedonist, I find the idea of building coffins very romantic. — Nick Offerman

I'm obsessed with the Victorian era and the British Royal Navy ... I'd love to play a troubled sailor or captain or a boatman on a three masted ship. — Nick Offerman

I don't put a great deal of stock in art trophies. — Nick Offerman

If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, then your pants are tucked into your shirt. — Nick Offerman

We didn't have to do anything to have a good time. It's an incredible gift to be able to make your own fun. — Nick Offerman

And what we've lost sight of is that performing manual labor with your hands is one of the most incredibly satisfying and positive things you can do. — Nick Offerman

It's funny, growing up there was never anybody around me with any kind of artistic bent. — Nick Offerman

Jobs that require a suit upset me. They displease me much, as our world is rife with such superficial conformity. — Nick Offerman

If you want to be happy in life, consider yourself a student. Every day of your life, think: how can I improve? — Nick Offerman

The world is split into two halves: the bacon, and the bacon eaters. — Nick Offerman

I'm always pleased that I managed to stay out of jail throughout my tenure in Chicago. — Nick Offerman

Follow your gut, make a choice, and throw yourself into it. If you make a mistake, then you have merely afforded yourself a valuable lesson. — Nick Offerman

I keep having these bros come up to me and say, "I used to watch you when I was a fetus," and I just want to kill them. — Nick Offerman

The older I get, the more my parents just seem like absolute heroes to me — Nick Offerman

If I had more time, I'd watch more woodworking or home-improvement shows, but, not enough hours in the day. — Nick Offerman

Whenever I have a stubborn position on something, I take a deep breath and swallow myself. — Nick Offerman

The ultimate disguise is nothing. Nudity. — Nick Offerman

I never went too long without a job. The problem was a lot of the early jobs are almost more demoralizing than unemployment. — Nick Offerman

My wife happens to be probably the greatest working woman in comedy. I can't think of anyone who even approaches her achievements and her abilities. — Nick Offerman

I can tell you I've crunched the numbers time and time again; it is always more fun to have eight people with one beer than one man with eight beers. — Nick Offerman

People are afraid that they're going to upset somebody on top, and so there's a real sense of, I've got to be quiet, I don't want to be fired. — Nick Offerman

I've never met anyone nicer than my mom, and I've met Donny and Marie. — Nick Offerman

Love one another, make something with your hands, and exalt the farmer. — Nick Offerman

I always drastically changed my look for each role. It's gotten a little tedious in real life, also, because there's no hiding. — Nick Offerman

How lucky my life is that I have two arms, and two legs, and ten fingers with which to make things out of wood. — Nick Offerman

It's taken me a lot of years to peel away my own layers. — Nick Offerman

I've split my life between a few different disciplines. — Nick Offerman

Before people figured out I was funny, I got cast quite a bit as either a rapist or serial killer or the guy who catches those people. — Nick Offerman

I just always had a penchant for performing for people.I'm a jackass clown. — Nick Offerman

When we think of an actor, we think of a tanned, frosted-tipped, model-looking guy. We don't think of a plumber. — Nick Offerman

Figure out what you love to do, then figure out how to get paid to do it. — Nick Offerman

Once you have a PhD, every meeting you go to becomes a doctor's appointment. — Nick Offerman

I learned as a young man that I don't write jokes, but that I can deliver more mundane material and get a laugh. I call myself a humorist. — Nick Offerman

I am always so happy to be at 'SNL.' I still feel like a kid when I'm there, like I can't believe I'm watching them make the show. — Nick Offerman

I always had a lot of confidence in my work and the unique flavor I like to bring to my characters, but you know I'm not a huge dreamer. — Nick Offerman

I really bridled when Parks And Rec became popular and woodworking publications wanted me to do stuff with them. — Nick Offerman

Children are so egocentric - they want to watch their lives, and not yours. — Nick Offerman

I come from a family of fishermen. Fishing is very important to us. We don't hunt. We're not gun folk. — Nick Offerman

Pursue decency in all dealings with your fellow man and woman. Simply put? Don't be an asshole. — Nick Offerman

What will people say? Who fucking cares. — Nick Offerman

I learned the word non-conformist in fourth grade and immediately announced that I would grow up to become one. — Nick Offerman