Number 1 Funny Quotes: top 31 famous quotes about Number 1 Funny

Number 1 Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Number 1 Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Now he could work her likeness into any story of his choosing. Now he could fight dragons for her. And now he could kiss her again. — Sherry Thomas

Woah, their gorgeous not so fast I haven't even catched your name or your number - Jaxson Evans — Brit Gosik

Girls are like exotic birds. They are pretty to look at but hard to catch. — Howie Dorough

To grow up, be a Kid again. — Vikrmn

I mean, my age is just a number. So what if you were born in the era when they still used rotary phones and cassette tapes? I think it's cute. — T.S. Krupa

Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? — Steven Wright

When I reflect upon the number of disagreeable people who have gone on to a better world, I am moved to lead a different life. — Mark Twain

Rule number four for me as a writer? Plotlines are like sharks: They either keep moving or they die. ~J.R. Ward — J.R. Ward

Since our greatest need was forgiveness, God sent us a Savior. He became like us, so we could become like Him. — Max Lucado

You know you are in love when you are willing to share your cash-machine number. — Elayne Boosler

Sex is Number 1 of my Top-10 joys in retirement. Number 2 is reading How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free. I forgot the other eight. — Ernie J Zelinski

Number one way life would be different if dogs ran the world: All motorists must drive with head out window. — David Letterman

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress. — Will Rogers

Thirty ways to shape up for summer. Number one: eat less. Number two: exercise more. Number three: what was I talking about again? I'm so hungry. — Maria Bamford

Whether it was a song, a person, or a story, there was a lot you couldn't know from just an excerpt, a glance, or part of a chorus. — Sarah Dessen

The likelihood of getting lost is directly proportional to the number of times the direction-giver says, 'You can't miss it'. — Hal Roach

The security guy asked my name address and phone number, and then he asked me what was the difference between a condom and a cockpit. — Chuck Palahniuk

The number of times he'd had to pinch his nose to keep his soul in so that he'd make no noise while peering through the parlor keyhole... — Emma Trevayne

Along with all else, Sandman is a comic strip for intellectuals, and I say it's about time. — Norman Mailer

I met this girl, she was an actress, and she gave me her number. It started with 555. — Mitch Hedberg

There is a number missing. I can see it. — Eugene Ormandy

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number? — Robin Williams

The number one rule of comedy acting is 'don't try to be funny.' Act as seriously as possible. — Daniel J. Goor

Operator! Give me the number for 911! — Dan Castellaneta

On examinations: Das Wissen ist der Tad der Forschung.
Knowledge is the death of research.
Nernst's motto. — Walther Nernst

I read that MTV's Real World got 40,000 applications. That's amazing, such an even number. You would have thought it would be 40,008. — Mitch Hedberg

I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number ... She looked great going down the stairs. — Milton Jones

Brookfield High School. How may I direct your call? No, sir, this is not a waste- disposal unit, I'm afraid you have the wrong number. — Jaclyn Moriarty

I must be very complex, judging by the number of days determined to define me. — Spuds Crawford

There is someone warming up in the Giants' bullpen, but he's obscured by his number. — Jerry Coleman

Ideas are easy; Saying it is easy; Doing it is difficult. — Steve Wynn