Not Funny But It Is Quotes: top 88 famous quotes about Not Funny But It Is

Not Funny But It Is Quotes & Sayings

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We all flinched as Ray flipped the breaker back on, but my laboratory again failed to erupt in flames. It must be a mad scientist record. — Richard Roberts

Funny that. We live in islands of Hours and we never seem to have time enough for anything ... — Clive Barker

Hide your gold, your faith and the reason of you journey. — Eduard Heine

For the hackneyed art of lying without injury to anyone, Rushbrook, to his shame, was proficient. — Elizabeth Inchbald

I think I got a lot of my 'funny' DNA from my mother, who had a glorious sense of the ridiculous. — Christopher Buckley

Her hands were large and knuckley and calloused, made to hold a rifle, not a needle. — Hilary Mantel

One does not simply ring Roland.
Oh boy. I supposed I would get a lecture on the dangers of wandering into Mordor next. — Ilona Andrews

White people, you did not get a receipt for niggas, you can not return us! — Katt Williams

If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable. — Darynda Jones

I'm so careless that now i don't even care if i cared about you. — Me

I think people like comedies and I think concept driven comedies seem to be working when it's a clear concept and you deliver funny stuff. — Todd Phillips

And there's no damage to the car. Except to the car itself. — Murray Walker

It is funny how no one seems to want my always excellent advice. — Anne Lamott

America is still AmeriKKKa. rather we like it or not — Fee Scott

It is very funny, but you do not always have to see people to love them. Just think about it, and see if it isn't so. — Kate Douglas Wiggin

The funny part about Islam is; even if you rape a woman, it would be considered as her fault. — M.F. Moonzajer

If I let you go are you going to hit me again?"
"What do you think?"
"Then I'm not going to let you go. — Sarah Mayberry

I don't want want to go to jail, I'm fragile. — Adam Sandler

More you know, better advice you give. Less you know, more advice you give. — Gerry Geek

-"He loved her ... It was noble of him. It was beautiful."
-"It was stupid. — Lloyd Alexander

Culver is a language magnet school. What it's mainly a magnet for, if you want to know the truth, is nerds. — Dave Barry

All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me. — Mitch Hedberg

Forever is a very long time, especially the bit towards the end. — Janna Levin

I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun that is funny. — Dr. Seuss

The way I deliver it is meant to be fun. Does it hurt sometimes? Yes, but it is meant to be funny not offensive. — Michelle Visage

Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on. — Betty White

Sadness is like growing of hairs around our ass; we may not like it or want it, but it is surprisingly always there. — M.F. Moonzajer

It is funny how you do not miss affection until it is given, but once it is, it can never be enough; you would drown in it if possible. — Libba Bray

Yes, I believe blue material is funny, but if that's all you've got, you're dead in the water. It's not good. — Howard Stern

Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there. — Carol Leifer

Climate change is like my head: it's not visible in every instance, but I'm pretty darn sure it's there. — Kevin Focke

Racism is not funny, because it won't solve anything, but making it worst instead, because racism is the reason the world is no longer great. — Werley Nortreus

I know jazz is completely un-American. But the reason why America doesn't like it is because it's not funny. We [americans] have made jazz funny. — Paul Provenza

Nobody wants to give up a weekend-long excuse to dress up and attempt to outshine one another. — Elizabeth Eulberg

Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door? — Steven Wright

There's not enough psychedelic stuff on TV. I want the world to be a bit weirder than it is. I hate reality, so I hate reality TV. But I love Columbo. — Noel Fielding

Real comedy is not when you laugh at an idiot, it's when the idiot laughs at you. — Raheel Farooq

It is funny that some of must not only get our bearings but must also know all the details of the world before we venture out into it. — Jack Henry Abbott

I do not have a helmet. But this is a wig, so it's a little protective. — Zach Galifianakis

I write about wounds, the eternal treasons of life. It's not very funny, but it's sincere. My commitment is to sincerity. — Tahar Ben Jelloun

"vers libre," (free verse) or nine-tenths of it, is not a new metre any more than sleeping in a ditch is a new school of architecture. — G.K. Chesterton

It is not against the law to be a nincompoop. If so, I would have a rap sheet as long as my arm. — Sue Ann Jaffarian

But the purpose of the book is not the horror, it is horror's defeat. — Terry Pratchett

Why is it that when you wipe up dust its called dusting but when you wipe up a spill its not called spilling? Just something to think about. — Ellen DeGeneres

Is it spoken word? Kinda, but that's a weird area. Is it comedy? Well, it's funny but no, it's not comedy. — Bruce McCulloch

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you. — Criss Jami

It's funny, 'cause you think surfing is your whole life, but then when you make a family it seems like it's not at all. — Joel Parkinson

Please stop waiting for a map. We reward those who draw maps, not those who follow them. — Seth Godin

I take Charb's point, but at some point has Charlie Hebdo been trying to have it both ways because some of what they do is not funny. — Scott Simon

The American Dream is not to own your own home, but to get your kids out of it. — Dick Armey

It sounds funny, but my biggest fear is that I'm not perfect. I'm a perfectionist, and I get upset when things go wrong or when I don't do well. — Nick Jonas

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not "Eureka!" (I found it!) but 'That's funny ... — Isaac Asimov

Humor is unavoidable. It might not feel funny in the moment, but more often than not there's a light at the end of the tunnel. — Ron Howard

I'd rather hug Magic Johnson after he rolled around in barbed wire. — Jim Norton

She wanted to be given a funny script so that she could make it funnier. — Nick Hornby

She shuddered. What is it with slobbery kissers? Are they trying to drown us in spit? I mean, Jesus, swallow every now and then. — Tammara Webber

The ballgame is over ... in this inning. — Jerry Coleman

Being good has nothing to do with being a Boy !!. Better is the latter! — Nelson Jack

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? — Jerry Seinfeld

Groupies will give you Chlamydia, Edward."
"Right, Virg. Groupies throw underwear on stage. They don't throw flowers. — Andrew Barger

Most man can think no better than a child! This fact perfectly explains why there are so many funny beliefs! — Mehmet Murat Ildan

I had a dream about you last night. We watched pornography together, but purely for the storyline. — Michael Summers

I find it very difficult to be funny, it's much easier to do tragedy than it is to do comedy. — Eric Drooker

He runs to the sink to spit it out. I grin. There's nothing quite as funny as someone else's misery. — Holly Black

Moving on was going to require leaving the woods and getting a friend set that didn't have gray hairs, hip replacements and a few false teeth. — Rebecca Brooks

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.
It's really funny. — Brandon Sanderson

As humans we speak one language ... — Avril Lavigne

Mitt Romney had a horse competing in the Olympics. He didn't win. But next year, he'll be competing in 'Dancing with the Stars.' — David Letterman

It's funny; recently I've started to notice people's impersonations of me, and it's basically like a hyperactive child. — Dave Grohl

Luck is merely a product of the happily delusional mind. — Lois Greiman

How much detention did you get?
Two weeks. One per arsehole. — Stephanie Perkins

You're impossible," she told him.
"Of course I am," he answered. "It's part of my charm. — David Eddings

That Asian guy is really good at kicking. Shocking. Someone is pressing 'A' really fast somewhere. — Daniel Tosh

Is that a rule? Do you have a rule that you can't kiss people in the morning? — Holly Hood

To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click 'I agree'. — Bill Maher

Life is funny; it really is. — Karyn Bosnak

It's so funny to think that I used to be a model and here I am doing arbitrage, shipping and negotiating margins, the list is endless. — Caprice Bourret

I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming. — Demetri Martin

Was that suit made to order? Where were you at the time? — Henny Youngman

I want to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It'd have to be real big. — Mitch Hedberg

Faith is Hope on a treadmill. Love is the reason we stay on. — Solange Nicole

I see some people with glasses here, I trust people with glasses, don't you? But if you're wearing your glasses like this ... "Get away from 'em!" — Jim Gaffigan

If I was a mechanic and someone called me and said their car would not start, I would say, "Hey - maybe a killer is after you!" — Mitch Hedberg

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number? — Robin Williams

Jack Black is so funny! On and off screen, like, he would make you laugh every day. He's hilarious. — Caitlin Hale

I got my start in silent radio. — Bob Monkhouse

In the silence, the bear died. It was a cute death, with funny music. — Orson Scott Card

Text messages are dying a funny kind of death. — Anonymous