My Eyes Funny Quotes: top 62 famous quotes about My Eyes Funny

My Eyes Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational My Eyes Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Sometimes, if you close your eyes and keep still, you can be invisible. Ostriches know this." - Constantine — Jamie Delano

Just rolled out of bed."
"I can see that." His eyes swept over me. "You should roll around in your bed more often. — Veronica Blade

Snake eyes is a gambling term, and an animal term, too. — Mitch Hedberg

He glanced up once, eyes bored. Please stop talking. I'm trying to eat. — Kate Avery Ellison

Spandex bodysuits, huh?" His eyes twinkled. "If that's what turns you on - I'm all for giving it a try. — J.C. Reed

You're not celibate, then?" I breathe.
Amusement lights up his eyes.
"No, Anastasia, I'm not celibate. — E.L. James

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. — David Letterman

I think the eyes flirt most. There are so many ways to use them. — Anna Held

We still have a lot to talk about," I said. "Talk?" He shook his head, his eyes full of desire. Kiss, he whispered to my thoughts. — Becca Fitzpatrick

Mel: Does Bret's girlfriend look anything like me? Murray: A little, around the eyes. Mel: Oh yeah? Big eyes huh? Murray: Well ... she's got eyes. — Kristen Schaal

Anything above 40 is a little too old for me. I just look for a girl who is funny and has nice eyes and a smile. — Justin Bieber

I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy
eyes - and moreover, I will go with thee to thy uncle's. — William Shakespeare

You're chained up." A wince pulled at Safi's eyes. "I upset the Admiral." "Of course you did." "It's not funny. — Susan Dennard

And the last thought he had that morning as he closed his eyes was: I hope the tornado hit the moose. — Gary Paulsen

His eyes are a hazy swirl of
gray, like a thick mass of clouds gathering before an impending storm — Elle Kennedy

The first thing men notice about a woman is her eyes. Then, when her eyes aren't looking, they notice her breasts. — Conan O'Brien

Dude, are my eyes seeing what my brain is telling my eyes that they're seeing? — James Roday

Henry narrowed his eyes at me. "You going somewhere?"
"Lacrosse field trip," I said. "I enjoy whacking the hell out of people with mallets. — Robin Benway

He had bright elfin eyes and a knowledgeable ass. — Chris Hannan

You look worse today than you did when you had two black
eyes."
"Why, thank you, Tyler. You always say the sweetest things. — Gwen Hayes

Six minutes isn't sex," I hear him
saying as my eyes crash shut. "Six
minutes is a boiled egg. — Sophie Kinsella

Because you've been on dates where y'know, you forget to open your eyes and wear pants and speak English. — David Cross

I can't see anything" he said in a muffled voice, hand over his eyes. "I'm blind. — L.J.Smith

Oh, dear God and baby Jesus in the manger, my eyes!" Dee shrieked. "My eyes! — Jennifer L. Armentrout

You killed my Dad." Any trace of kindness or sympathy vanished from Rixon's eyes.
"Well this is awkward. — Becca Fitzpatrick

What your mind sees when you close your eyes marks the entrance to an endless universe: your imagination. — Stephen Helmes

The thought of being with Shay Wilder makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a butter knife — Lisa McMann

I tell yeh, Bright-eyes. Men and women? A bloody mess. Every time. — David Kudler

I rolled my eyes. "Do all narcotics officers lack basic human
compassion, or were you just not hugged enough as a child?"
Trust Me — L.A. Witt

I sometimes close my eyes during a show because I have drawn a picture of an audience enjoying the show more on the back of my eyelids. — Mitch Hedberg

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye. — Cathy Guisewite

Champagne's funny stuff. I'm used to whiskey. Whiskey is a slap on the back, and champagne's a heavy mist before my eyes. — James Stewart

Keep your eyes on him, you wretched vainglorious creature, — Naomi Novik

It's funny how he refuses to make eye contact during sex yet can't seem to keep his eyes off me the rest of the time. — Colleen Hoover

Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough? — Murray Walker

Your eyes shine," he said. "How do they do that?"
"Blood," she said. — Aimee Bender

EXTREMELY FUNNY! A SUPER-VIRTUOSO! I expected to enjoy 'The Two and Only,' but I didn't expect to be touched, much less to find my eyes growing moist. — Terry Teachout

People were stopping me on the street to say, 'Oh my God, it's Crazy Eyes!' Which is kind of a funny thing to have people shout at you on the street. — Uzo Aduba

I do find things funny. When you see life through the eyes of someone with a good sense of humor, which my grandmother did, life is a human comedy. — George Takei

TV is chewing gum for the eyes. — Frank Lloyd Wright

It's all about one split-second. Boxing is a funny thing. You blink your eyes and somebody says good night to you. — Kostya Tszyu

The anecdote was funny, but as my father gazed across the river at the university of his youth, his Russian life was in his eyes. — Paullina Simons

Marked by justice," I say. Sevro rolls his eyes. "What? I can be funny." "Keep practicing. — Pierce Brown

As you can see, visually, with your eyes. — Murray Walker

Look at your eyes. You've got bigger bags than Louis Vuitton. — Matt Dunn

"I've done your dog. It's got nine eyes down the side, I made his head all square, 15 legs. What do you think of that?" "Fido looks a bit weird." — Eddie Izzard

Toto was not gray; he was a little black dog, with long silky hair and small black eyes that twinkled merrily on either side of his funny, wee nose. — L. Frank Baum

Life and death played out before my very eyes.
You don't see these things if you clean your room regularly. — Joan Bauer

Best to have only a few absolutely perfect trait - for example, my hair and eyes and sparkling personality - so you don't overwhelm. — Kiersten White

And then I met a woman,
now comes the funny part;
with eyes that petrified my brain
and sunk into my heart. — Hugh Antoine D'Arcy

His eyes widened. Oh, hell, you think I'm going to let him bite me? No way. It's too risky and way too guy. — C.C. Hunter

My eyes are different sizes, my nose is too broad at the bridge and squishes up when I laugh, and my lips are sorta funny when I smile. — Terry Farrell

Travel like Ghandi, with simple clothes, open eyes and an uncluttered mind. — Rick Steves

Close your eyes!"
"You can't kiss me from down there, Wylan."
"Just do it! — Leigh Bardugo

Let your eyes talk, mouth listens and ear sleeps. — Santosh Kalwar

She says with that misty
far-away look in her eyes. Like conjunctivitis. — Aditi Mathur Kumar

Good Lord, that has to be the homeliest woman I have ever laid eyes on. My horse's face is better-looking. — Kathleen Bittner Roth

On respect for the Queen: When I lick a stamp I always do it with my eyes closed. — Russell Brand

That's all right," she told him. "I can manage. I can sleep outside just fine."
Four pairs of eyes looked at her with a distinctly male skepticism. — Ilona Andrews

An evil spark flared in his eyes. Trade: raccoon for some answers. — Ilona Andrews

I don't like John Terry and I never have. He's got funny eyes and he's a cry baby. He's also a Cockney. — Noel Gallagher

What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don't like? I don't like the idea of that. — Karl Pilkington