Humor Sports Quotes: top 39 famous quotes about Humor Sports

Humor Sports Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Humor Sports quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I've never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes. — Leo Durocher

The woman serving me was wearing a white sports bra that looked like it had been mauled by tigers
desert isle chic. — Dave Eggers

They aren't the brightest crayons in the box
-Max(saving the world and other extreme sports) — James Patterson

Striking up conversations with strangers is something like extreme sports for autistic people. — Kamran Nazeer

Sleepwalking is the perfect exorcise for lazy people — Benny Bellamacina

Sports bars are also a great place for guys to meet other guys
either for sex or for wrestling, whichever feels more right. — Eugene Mirman

I'm not sure who invented dodgeball, but I can almost guarantee you that it wasn't the shortest kid in the class. — John Bingham

When four or more men get together, they talk about sports. — Rita Rudner

someone like Grace. Someone exactly like Grace, with her Ted Bundy rants
and her calming presence and - hello, irony. — Elle Kennedy

His eyes are a hazy swirl of
gray, like a thick mass of clouds gathering before an impending storm — Elle Kennedy

A baseball club for girls? — Emily J. Proctor

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. — Dave Barry

Let's talk about the homoerotic undertones in sports," she said.
Paul thrust his head forward as if he hadn't heard right. "Excuse me? — Deirdre Martin

Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent? — Dave Barry

The miracle isn't that I finished. The miracle is that I had the courage to start. — John Bingham

Success at sports is the province of the almost empty head. — Jonathan Franzen

The problem with winter sports is that
follow me closely here
they generally take place in winter. — Dave Barry

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back. — Woody Allen

I broke up with her to avoid getting into a serious relationship with her, and now it — Elle Kennedy

Nothing amuses people more than a cocky guy who starts losing. — Criss Jami

I only like sports that Bond villains played. — Craig Ferguson

Never approach a crying woman entering a sports bar carrying a harpoon gun. — George Carlin

One time I was forced to go to the doctors because of a sports accident. Herpes. — Mitch Hedberg

Outcasts may grow up to be novelists and filmmakers and computer tycoons, but they will never be the athletic ruling class. — Chuck Klosterman

I have five boys in the family, and it's constant competition, sport, humor, and practical jokes. — Mitt Romney

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. It took one afternoon on the golf course. — Hank Aaron

Wisdom of the Ages "Assault and Battery" Weather forecast for the St. Louis Rams next Sunday in Seattle. — Matthew D. Heines

Sports fans eat shit. — George Carlin

We should have wars. Then there would be no need for sports. — Michelle Franklin

Reggie, you wrapped your sports car around a telephone pole after drinking a bar."
"Yeah... But I was wearing my seatbelt. — Daniel Younger

And all those things you listed right now, they're
things Garrett and I do together. Dude, you don't want me. You want me and
Garrett. — Elle Kennedy

The roof was torn off the gym. God's way of telling the jocks that they'd better remember who's really charge. — Dana Reinhardt

I love seeing other channels counterprogram the Super Bowl. PBS: DAMN RIGHT we're airing a new 'Masterpiece Classic'! Fuck off, sports! — Tara Ariano

I don't let birdies and pars get in the way of having a good time — Angelo Spagnolo

I've fallen in love with baseball. — Nick Jonas

I have never seen a wrestling match or prize fight, and I don't want to. When I find out a man is interested in these sports, I drop him. — Hedy Lamarr

Yeah, because off the ice the only language Stephanie speaks is fluent Bitch. — Jennifer Comeaux

Princess, the contents of your shoe closet would break the budgets of a lot of third world countries - Jake Malone — Mackenzie Crowne

I have no sense of humor about losing — Rafael Nadal