Health Funny Quotes: top 31 famous quotes about Health Funny

Health Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Health Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

Health Funny Quotes By R.v.m.: You spend your TIME to make a DIME.

You spend your TIME to make a DIME. You lose your HEALTH to make your WEALTH, but at the end it is FUNNY because you leave back all your MONEY. — R.v.m.

Health Funny Quotes By Walter Rauschenbusch: History is never antiquated, because humanity is always

History is never antiquated, because humanity is always fundamentally the same. — Walter Rauschenbusch

Health Funny Quotes By Henny Youngman: I know a guy who had his doctor

I know a guy who had his doctor say, "Take some weight off, go to a health club." The man lost 20 pounds in one week! The machine tore his leg off! — Henny Youngman

Health Funny Quotes By Larry Flynt: You have to be able to tolerate what

You have to be able to tolerate what you don't necessarily like so you can be free. — Larry Flynt

Health Funny Quotes By Jonas Salk: Reply when questioned on the safety of the

Reply when questioned on the safety of the polio vaccine he developed:
It is safe, and you can't get safer than safe. — Jonas Salk

Health Funny Quotes By Thomas Carlyle: Is there no God, then, but at best

Is there no God, then, but at best an absentee God, sitting idle, ever since the first Sabbath, at the outside of his Universe? — Thomas Carlyle

Health Funny Quotes By Brady Anderson: It's so funny that people specify that year

It's so funny that people specify that year because in a way it was the biggest battle for me health wise. — Brady Anderson

Health Funny Quotes By Steven Wright: I used to work at a health food

I used to work at a health food store. I got fired for drinking straight Bosco on the job. — Steven Wright

Health Funny Quotes By Chelsea Clinton: I'm a big health food freak and a

I'm a big health food freak and a vegetarian devotee. — Chelsea Clinton

Health Funny Quotes By Cassandra Clare: My shoulder will never be the same. I

My shoulder will never be the same. I expect you to nurse me back to health. — Cassandra Clare

Health Funny Quotes By Sol Luckman: Unhealthy behavior is actually common among doctors, who

Unhealthy behavior is actually common among doctors, who tend to know a lot about medicine but very little about health. — Sol Luckman

Health Funny Quotes By Jack White: It's hard to find other musicians that push

It's hard to find other musicians that push you to go somewhere new all the time. — Jack White

Health Funny Quotes By Tanya Masse: I don't need a personal trainer ... I

I don't need a personal trainer ... I need someone to stalk me and threaten to kick my ass when I eat and drink stuff I'm not supposed to! — Tanya Masse

Health Funny Quotes By Lemony Snicket: Literature doesn't exactly have a strong mental-health track

Literature doesn't exactly have a strong mental-health track record. — Lemony Snicket

Health Funny Quotes By Cher: Fitness - if it came in a bottle,

Fitness - if it came in a bottle, everybody would have a great body. — Cher

Health Funny Quotes By Barbara Stanwyck: My only problem is finding a way to

My only problem is finding a way to play my fortieth fallen female in a different way from my thirty-ninth. — Barbara Stanwyck

Health Funny Quotes By Fisher Amelie: I made it my job to know good

I made it my job to know good music, Tom. It's why I'm here ... with you. — Fisher Amelie

Health Funny Quotes By Seth Rogen: I'm actually way more funny now, because I'm

I'm actually way more funny now, because I'm hungry ... If comedy comes from pain, I should be funnier now than I ever was. — Seth Rogen

Health Funny Quotes By Emily Bronte: I have not broken your heart - you

I have not broken your heart - you have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine. — Emily Bronte

Health Funny Quotes By Rebecca McNutt: You have more issues than Reader's Digest.

You have more issues than Reader's Digest. — Rebecca McNutt

Health Funny Quotes By Nicholas Sparks: Gossip is one thing, hurtful gossip is completely

Gossip is one thing, hurtful gossip is completely another, and even in high school we weren't THAT mean. — Nicholas Sparks

Health Funny Quotes By Michael Lewis: You want loyalty, hire a cocker spaniel.

You want loyalty, hire a cocker spaniel. — Michael Lewis

Health Funny Quotes By Kensington Gore: You know, sex at seventy-six is getting very

You know, sex at seventy-six is getting very dangerous for my health ... since I live at seventy-nine! — Kensington Gore

Health Funny Quotes By Jenny Han: I keep trying to block it out, but

I keep trying to block it out, but it keeps on coming back. — Jenny Han

Health Funny Quotes By Shannon L. Alder: Laughter is the only medicine, without side effects.

Laughter is the only medicine, without side effects. — Shannon L. Alder

Health Funny Quotes By John Churton Collins: Envy and fear are the only passions to

Envy and fear are the only passions to which no pleasure is attached. — John Churton Collins

Health Funny Quotes By Regina Griffin: Ish #303 It's a street food vendor! Stop

Ish #303 It's a street food vendor! Stop asking for the health score rating. — Regina Griffin

Health Funny Quotes By F Scott Fitzgerald: Never miss a party ... good for the

Never miss a party ... good for the nerves
like celery. — F Scott Fitzgerald

Health Funny Quotes By W.C. Fields: After two days in the hospital, I turn

After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse. — W.C. Fields

Health Funny Quotes By Henny Youngman: 2 Guys in a health club, one is

2 Guys in a health club, one is putting on pantyhose. "Since when do you wear pantyhose?" "Since my wife found it in the glove compartment!" — Henny Youngman

Health Funny Quotes By Mat Oxley: Racers never lose their skill, they just lose

Racers never lose their skill, they just lose the will to use it, and until they reach that point they keep getting faster. — Mat Oxley