Funny Thinking Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about Funny Thinking

Funny Thinking Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Funny Thinking quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.' — Larry David

I always tell people it's funny that they think I'm a relationship expert because my two books are about getting out of relationships. — Greg Behrendt

I'll tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless! — Rodney Dangerfield

Classes teaching you how to breathe. I'm 32, I think I've got the hang of it. — Karl Pilkington

Most of the stories I have go downhill quickly. In all honesty most of the good stories I have, no one else would think is funny. — JD Era

Don't you think its quite weird for Prince Harry, getting really stoned and seeing your grans face appearing on your money. — Frankie Boyle

If you think is was an accident, applaud. — Geraldo Rivera

I spend a lot of time thinking about what I do and how it fits into the scheme of things. I won't do something just because it's funny. — Joel Hodgson

Two things are not debatable: eroticism, and comedy. If you don't think it's sexy, or funny, there's no way I can change your mind. — Gene Siskel

Do you ever do something, and then think to yourself: That's So Raven? — Zach Galifianakis

Don't feel bad for me. I think I'm, like, so pretty. — Amy Schumer

Philosophers, Poets and Fools have similar Consciousness — Amit Gupta

I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points? — Woody Allen

I think being funny had something to do with feeling like an outsider, not feeling cool - insecurity. — Kumail Nanjiani

I wonder what chairs think about all day: "Oh, here comes another asshole." — Robin Williams

I think the reason I became funny was because if I made people laugh, they would let me keep talking. — Anthony Jeselnik

I can't help thinking the failed New York bomber would've done far more damage if he'd simply driven throught Times Square in a Toyota. — Frankie Boyle

I think that should be the anti - speeding advert it should be footage of Richard Hammond trying to remember his own wedding day. — Frankie Boyle

I like being a funny lady. I think theres nothing sexier than a funny lady. — Maya Rudolph

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow. — Dylan Moran

I think I'm the most underrated superstar that's out there, but that doesn't matter to me. — Carmelo Anthony

I want to do drama - no one really sees that. People just think I'm the funny guy and I can't do anything else, and that's just not true. — Mark Indelicato

I'd love to do sitcoms. I think I'm pretty darn funny. — Yasmine Bleeth

Pickup lines never work ... I think someone clever, witty and funny is very attractive. — Kate Upton

I think it's nice to get a break from all of the big Hollywood comic book action-movies and see something that's relatable and funny and interesting. — Aubrey Plaza

A lot of my early pictures are, I think, quite funny. And these days I tend to look for comedy more and more. — Helen Levitt

There are men who can think no deeper than a fact. — Voltaire

I don't care what anybody says, I think that George Bush is absolutely the right president to oversea the end of the world. — Marc Maron

Let me ask you a question. How long is too long to text someone back? My wife still thinks I died in 9/11. — Frankie Boyle

At what age do you think it's appropriate to tell a highway it's adopted? — Zach Galifianakis

I took 'P.S. I Love You' thinking it was going to be a little funny, and I ended up crying every day on that film. — Hilary Swank

I'm no expert, Rock, but I don't think I have any poontang ... to give you. — Mick Foley

Life has a funny way of helping you out when you think that everything's gone wrong. — Alanis Morissette

The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible. — David Ogilvy

That was before I'd started thinking about how life stuck on a ship wouldn't be so bad if Elder walked around pantless more. — Beth Revis

I have no illusions about my looks. I think my face is funny. — Audrey Hepburn

I'm not ashamed of being a bubbly, funny person. I think that's as valid as being the dark, brooding, tortured Oscar-nominated one. — Cameron Diaz

I think that life is very dark at times and there are things that are very funny about that. — Brett Gelman

A lot of the things I do are the sort of things I think are funny. — Eugene Mirman

Sex and murder are the same. Well, you say the same after both don't you? 'Damn I got to get the hell out of here! What was I thinking!' — Dave Attell

There's a fear that I don't think people are interested in my actual opinion. I just think people are interested in me being funny. — Nick Thune

I don't think of any sentence as a "one-liner", but I do pay attention to how people actually speak when they are being funny. Rhythm is key. — Lorrie Moore

That's the only dog I know who can smell someone just thinking about food. — Charles M. Schulz

Intellectually, I think everyone really knows that women are funny, but it's a weird thing that people keep trotting out. — Bonnie McFarlane

At one point you think, well, it's funny, I could just be a starving actor. So if somebody were to pull the plug, there'd be no room for complaint. — Michael Fassbender

I think this whole celebrity world is weird anyway. Weird and funny and kind of pathetic and yet so right for parody. — Ben Stiller

Dress like Britney Spears and think like me, and everything will be fine. — Madonna Ciccone

Do you think pandas know they're Chinese and they're taking the one child policy a bit too seriously? — Jim Jefferies

Elephants are so wise and so funny and so endangered and so intelligent. I just think there is a lot to learn from them. — Gloria Steinem

I think therefore I am not sure. — Ljupka Cvetanova

Responding to a question about remarks attributed to him that he did not think were his: "I really didn't say everything I said." — Yogi Berra

I think religion is a funny thing because, when you see somebody who can really break it down, sometimes it feels foolish what you believe. — Kevin Costner

I think maybe to survive, I mean to just get through the day - I'm not saying that everything is hilariously funny. — Roz Chast

He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was three; I attended their funerals. — Mark Twain

I've got kids and that's important. It's funny, you think that there's an expiration date on them and there just isn't. — Bill Murray

I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. — George Carlin

It is funny how certain places get connected with certain people, and you never go back without thinking of them. — Jean Webster

I think people who are fanatical about anything are funny. — Jackie Schaffer

I wanted to get a tape recorder, but I got a parrot instead. I think I did that joke backwards. — Mitch Hedberg

Hysterically funny, amazingly talented people. That's what I think of when I think of Canada. That, and cold beer. And mountains. — Richard Patrick

I wrote an entire movie [Man up] about how important I think voices are, so it was funny. — Lake Bell

To me, the movie is more funny if, at the same time, you can think a little bit or dream a little bit. — Quentin Dupieux

Here. There. Everywhere." He leered at his friend. "Thinking about you and Moira's
underwear. — Dana Marie Bell

I often arrive at quite sensible ideas and judgements, on the spur of the moment. It is when I stop to think that I become foolish. — Jerome K. Jerome

Women are very funny. Some of the funniest people I can think of are women. — Rachel Bloom

The accents are really really funny. I think I could convince somebody I was from New Zealand. — Carter Jenkins

I've got a friend whose nickname is "Shagger". You might think that's pretty cool. She doesn't like it. — Jimmy Carr

You think you're funny! You think you're funny Cena, huh? The only pose you're going to be doing tonight is lying on your back with me on top! — Randy Orton

I was a theater guy growing up and I wanted to be Al Pacino, and I think I just looked and sounded too funny. — Charlie Day

When you start explaining why something's funny or finding a formula for it I think it loses some of its funniness. — Betty White

I don't think half my stuff would be funny if the audience didn't feel at least a little bit safe that it's not how I truly feel. — Sarah Silverman

I don't know how high I went, I don't wanna know. Heights are not my favorite thing. It makes my balls go in my throat just thinking about it. — Chris Kyle

I don't do comedy. I think if a situation is funny you just play it for real and if it's funny, it's funny. — Morgan Freeman

There's a lot of guy comics who I think are funny, but I generally am more excited about a special or a show where there are females. — Margaret Cho

From my dad ... I think we have a similar sense of humor. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing, but I think he's funny! — Jenna Bush

I write in my own journal when something extraordinary or funny happens. And there's some nice imagery in there. I don't think of what to do with it. — Annie Dillard

I'm homeless, in a funny way. My culture I think is completely rooted in German 19th century music I suppose. — Hans Zimmer

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they
wouldn't have to go so fast. — Steven Wright

It's a real valley when I talk about veal. And calf roping. People were sensitive about calf roping. Which I think is quite funny. — Gary Gulman

I just like working with people that I respect and think are really funny. — Busy Philipps

Size does matter. There's a lot of ways to make people feel good, but personally I think it does enhance things. — Pamela Anderson

Sometimes I think I look like I've had facial reconstructive surgery. Like after burns. — Robert Pattinson

The movies are funny, in one way, because you think of everyone being as beautiful as the dawn, but that isn't true. — Julian Fellowes

I started doing pot jokes, and I noticed that audiences invariably love pot jokes. Even people who don't smoke pot think it's a funny subject. — Doug Benson

I didn't grow up identifying with beauty. I grew up thinking I could be smart and funny - those are the things I got feedback on. — Lauren Graham

Something feels funny. I must be thinking too hard. — A.A. Milne

I think whatever comes natural is probably the truth, and the truth is the strongest form of anything - whether serious or funny. — Charlyne Yi

I can only think of a handful of artists that can make a funny painting or a funny sculpture without it feeling coined in someway. — Joe Bradley

Do you think to yourself, 'Wow, I saw this chicken and she was gorgeous?' — Les Dennis

Think of your girlfriend or boyfriend or whomever you want to. — Eugene Ormandy

If you don't think you're funny, no one else will. — Joan Rivers

I'm too busy thinking what I'm going to say next to remember what I've said, but my staff tells me I'm sometimes funny. Not always on purpose, though. — Jared Polis

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you. — Criss Jami

I think they should put pies on the fronts of trains, so that when they hit something it's at least a little bit funny. — Demetri Martin

I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake. — Jimmy Carr

I'd shake his hand, but I think that's what's holding up his pants. — George Lopez

I've always tried to be funny, or stupid, or whatever. I love making people laugh and I think it comes quite naturally to me. — Brian Littrell

Kids like my act because I'm wearing nose glasses. Adults like my act because there's a guy who thinks putting on nose glasses is funny. — Steve Martin

The more I think of you, the less I think of you. — Henny Youngman

I make myself laugh all the time. I think I'm really funny. I do. — Mila Kunis