Food Funny Quotes: top 68 famous quotes about Food Funny

Food Funny Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Food Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

A ham sandwich is better than nothing. Nothing is better than eternal happiness. So eternal happiness is beaten by a ham sandwich. — Mark Forsyth

Other things are just food. But chocolate's chocolate. — Patrick Skene Catling

I enjoy cooking with wine, sometimes I even put it in the food I'm cooking. — Julia Child

Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is. — P. J. O'Rourke

Lunch makes me feel a bit better. — Suzanne Collins

Make [food] simple and let things taste of what they are. — Curnonsky

There were two Irishmen eating sandwiches in a pub and the landlord said: "You can't eat your own food in here." So they swapped sandwiches. — Frank Carson

EGGS! They're not a food, they belong in no group! They're just farts clothed in substance! — Dylan Moran

These are the best things I've ever had in my mouth! — Mora Early

How is it that food STILL contains calories that make you gain weight in the 21st CENTURY?! It's like scientists aren't even trying! — Tanya Masse

Never trust a skinny cook — Iain Hewitson

I used to work at a health food store. I got fired for drinking straight Bosco on the job. — Steven Wright

Well if this is really happening, and this psycho really did kidnap us, I want food. — L. Taylor

I'm a big health food freak and a vegetarian devotee. — Chelsea Clinton

I was just wondering, what would you say to a pair of kittens?"
""Hi, snack food? — Kaje Harper

Ala!" Echo sprang to her feet, legs tangled in the sheets. The Ala was here. The Ala had brought food. The Ala was a goddess — Melissa Grey

When they figure out how to bottle up orgasms and sell them as a food additive, I'll be first in line. — Nenia Campbell

It's not over till the fat lady eats! — Ljupka Cvetanova

The food on the plane was fit for a king. "Here, King!" — Henny Youngman

I love like I'm thirsty. Can I offer you a tall glass of Sahara sand? — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Research tells us that fourteen out of any ten individuals like chocolate. — Sandra Boynton

I spy, with my little eye, something that starts with ... G."
"Sausages. — Adam Rex

I do not do free e-books. I occasionally like to eat that thing you people call "food". — Carla H. Krueger

Be nice. Funny. Smart. Generous. Kind. Feed your body with good food. Your soul with good friends. And your mind with new things. — Jillian Dodd

It's delicious like my favorite treat! It's definitely good to eat! — Nor Sanavongsay

I love Pizza thicker, when the crust is thinner! — Jasleen Kaur Gumber

Some nice lady came over here with food for us all. She claimed to be your mother. I don't believe it
you're an asshole, and she's good people. — Amy Lane

Bread that must be sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing. — Fran Lebowitz

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine, something brussel sprouts never do. — P. J. O'Rourke

Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers. — Socrates

Avocados, it's a food that ain't worth injuring yourself for. If it's a hassle to get into, leave it to the experts. — Karl Pilkington

The human body is the best work of art. — Jess C. Scott

If a wizard should take up residence in your garden and requests food, you are obliged to feed him. — Mark Jackman

Let your food be your medicine, and your medicine be your food. — Hippocrates

Dessert was an over baked chocolate chip cookies the size of a hockey puck and just about as tasty. — Carl Hiaasen

I have a friend who is a funny cook. Her food tastes funny and smells funny — Haresh Daswani

Somebody dies and people eat your food. Funny how that works. — Sherman Alexie

I've noticed a funny thing about people who are over-weight. They spend all their time thinking about food -except when they're actually eating it — Paul McKenna

If she rented the studio in town, I'd probably never see either of my parents again. Well, except for dinner. They usually showed up for food — Maggie Stiefvater

Every single living thing is food to at least one living thing. — Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Revel in grossness. Leave food in your teeth. Proudly display feminine hygiene products. — Jennifer Ziegler

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. — Steven Wright

They have dog food for constipated dogs. If your dog is constipated, why screw up a good thing? Stay indoors and let 'em bloat! — David Letterman

She asked if I loved another woman, so I answered honestly and said, Dinner was great, but I could go for dessert. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Someone asked me recently - what would I rather give up, food or sex. Neither! I'm not falling for that one again, wife. — Mark Watson

I pat her on the head. "Oh, naive little Kitten. Dear, foolish girl. This cookie is worth all this and more. Sit or you will not partake. — Jenny Han

I wish happiness was some edible food easily available in stores... Oh wait, it is. — Hk

Ish #303 It's a street food vendor! Stop asking for the health score rating. — Regina Griffin

My love is meatloaf flavored. I just wish my meatloaf was also meatloaf flavored. — Dora J. Arod

YOU. GOT. FOOD. IN. MY. HAIR. — Stephenie Meyer

I like liquor - its taste and its effects - and that is just the reason why I never drink it. — Stonewall Jackson

I unwrapped my love for her like one might unwrap leftovers. Gotta eat up the old stuff first, as a cannibal might say in a retirement home. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

Sexual reproduction and food -- humans' two favorite subjects. — Melissa Landers

What kind of person doesn't let you have gummi bears? — Libba Bray

If there's a sexier sound on this planet than the person you're in love with cooing over the crepes you made for him, I don't know what it is. — Julie Powell

Love is a banana. First you peel it, and then you roll on the condom. — Dark Jar Tin Zoo

It's a funny thing about me. I don't have any interest in food most of the time now, although when I was a kid I was always hungry. — Alan Ladd

I want to woo you with food now that I've wooed you with words, song, and the magic of my interpretive dance. — Stacey Jay

If you want to keep people happy, just keep the food and entertainment rolling. — E.A. Bucchianeri

The whole point of straws, I had thought, was that you did not have to set down the slice of pizza to suck a dose of Coke while reading a paperback. — Nicholson Baker

What smells good may not always taste good, I leaned this the day I tried to eat a scented candle. — Kenny D. Eichenberg

I take my food very seriously. Whenever I hear that bell, I know Mrs. Norris is hankerin' for some spam. — Sandy Ward Bell

That's the only dog I know who can smell someone just thinking about food. — Charles M. Schulz

You have food?" Winter scolded. "I thought you said you were hungry."
I'm hungry for other things besides what I have," [Clover] argued. — Obert Skye

I want my lobster in bite-sized pieces! How dare you make me chew more than thrice? — Adam Jay Epstein

Silas consumed only one food, and it was not bananas. — Neil Gaiman

When you eat a lot of spicy food, you can lose your taste. When I was in India last summer, I was listening to a lot of Michael Bolton. — Jimmy Carr

He's such a dear, Mr. Garnet. A beautiful, pure, bred Persian. He has taken prizes."
"He's always taking something - generally food. — P.G. Wodehouse