Best And Funny Birthday Quotes: top 30 famous quotes about Best And Funny Birthday

Best And Funny Birthday Quotes & Sayings

Happy to read and share the best inspirational Best And Funny Birthday quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.' — Larry David

I'm easily frightened, and I've also come to realize that old Catholic guilt or remorse is easily stimulated. — Billy Collins

For my sister's 50th birthday, I sent her a singing mammogram. — Steven Wright

Last year my birthday cake looked like a prairie fire. — Rodney Dangerfield

Congratulations to your mom and dad for birth of a sweet child!

Sorry that I couldn't wish them when you were born. — Hasil Paudyal

Some friends of mine got me a sweater for my birthday. I'd have preferred a moaner or a screamer, but the sweater was OK. — Steven Wright

On this special Fathers Day, we'd like to wish all of you a very Happy Birthday. — Ralph Kiner

Dry your tears, have no fears. — Bob Marley

She's 80 my nan, what do you want for your birthday? "SHREDDER!! GET ME A SHREDDER!!", what do you want a shredder for? "IDENTITY THEFT!!". — Russell Howard

Learn how to read the love letters sent by the wind and rain, the snow and moon. — Ikkyu

On every thing are traced decay and change. Look! how the shifting seasons slip away. — Isaac McLellan

Far better it is to have a stout heart always and suffer one's share of evils, than to be ever fearing what may happen. — Herodotus

Milton Hope led the singing of Happy Birthday ... He would say, 'Keep it sweet and short and don't try to be funny.' — Bob Hope

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for. — Will Rogers

There are two kinds of hangover: in one you feel ill and incapable, in the other you feel ill and lucid. — John Fowles

I have no problems with buying tampons. I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a "proper" present. "Happy birthday, mum!" — Jimmy Carr

Lord, teach me to know you, and to know myself. — Saint Augustine

Everything is a learning experience. — Angus T. Jones

Saddam Hussein's regime is a gray and gathering danger. — George W. Bush

Act your age, not your shoe size. — Prince

There are no final words in science. But there you have the deeply anti-scientific temper of the global warming advocacy groups: Final words. — George F. Will

Through the years I've found that I prefer live playing to recording. I still do lots of recording - but I treasure the live shows. — Tony Levin

Pie can't compete with cake. Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, and somebody's drunk in the kitchen. — Jim Gaffigan

The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet. — Robert Orben

Better to have to retrace your steps and then move forward than never to move forward at all. — Anne Burack Sayre

On the Rampage, Pip, and off the Rampage, Pip - such is Life! — Charles Dickens

Christmas never would have caught on if it had been called Celebrate a Little Jew's Birthday. — Andy Borowitz

Paths are so much clearer when people stop looking at what everyone else is doing and instead concentrate on themselves
~Gabe — Cecelia Ahern

I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it. — Eva Gabor

A man who views the world the same ... — Muhammad Ali