About Funny Quotes: top 100 famous quotes about About Funny

About Funny Quotes & Sayings

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It is funny you know, you spend 12 years of your life learning about things and about life, but they never really tell you how hard life really is. — Amanda Peterson

And this is the third place car about to lap the second place car. — Murray Walker

The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it. — Mark Twain

I watched as an extremely nerdy exhibitor - I'm talking about a guy who makes Bill Gates look like Brad Pitt ... — Dave Barry

It started out as kind of a joke, and then it wasn't funny anymore because money became involved. Deep down, nothing about money is funny. — Charles Willeford

I'm so careless that now i don't even care if i cared about you. — Me

It's a funny thing about suspicions, Mr. Wright. All too often, they're just vain hopes in disguise. — Tessa Dare

Funny how people that don't believe in nothin' are so quick to believe every crazy story about people like us. — Dean Koontz

I spent 11 years at 'The Daily Show,' and I learned everything there about how to write funny, how to write funny on topic. — David Javerbaum

Writing is all about tents: sometimes you're competent, sometimes you're eloquetent. — Kevin Focke

I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning ... That can keep me awake for days.. — Billy Connolly

I had a dream about you. I licked your cone of ice cream. It was envelope flavored. — Melody Sohayegh

The funny thing about television is that once you start to do it you never get time to watch it. — Kevin Sorbo

The funny part about Islam is; even if you rape a woman, it would be considered as her fault. — M.F. Moonzajer

It's funny how much of your childhood is about proximity. — Jenny Han

Have they built cities on the moon?" another boy asked hopefully.
"We left some garbage and a flag there in the sixties, but thats about it. — Ransom Riggs

Funny thing about prayers. God hears them. But you just never know if, when, or how He's going to answer them. — Becky Wade

Never join with your friend when he abuses his horse or his wife, unless the one is about to be sold, the other to be buried. — Charles Caleb Colton

Thirty ways to shape up for summer. Number one: eat less. Number two: exercise more. Number three: what was I talking about again? I'm so hungry. — Maria Bamford

Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It's all funny. Next. Everyone gets so upset about the wrong things. — Joan Rivers

Particularly beautiful people were like particularly funny-looking people, though. Once you know them you mostly forgot about it. — Ann Brashares

I find it funny because people complain about Brooklyn becoming too hip, but would they prefer stock brokers or gunfights or something? — Kemp Muhl

A funny thing about tolerant people? They're really only tolerant when you agree with them. — Greg Gutfeld

We are about to be eaten by a dragon, you're crawling on bleeding hands through bat droppings, and you're worried about being proper? — Bethany Wiggins

It's all about one split-second. Boxing is a funny thing. You blink your eyes and somebody says good night to you. — Kostya Tszyu

To me this is not yelling. I am not yelling. I'm just passionate about my opinions and I want to tell you all of them before you start talking again. — Bill Burr

Secret 7591.42.21. Avoiding weasel words in your intelligence analysis isn't easy when your intelligence analysis is about weasels. — The Covert Comic

The funny thing about stop signs is that they're also start signs. — Maureen Johnson

It's a real valley when I talk about veal. And calf roping. People were sensitive about calf roping. Which I think is quite funny. — Gary Gulman

Don't worry about Sian," Louisa said, "things will get better."
"What, she'll stop hitting me?"
"No, but you'll stop bruising so easily. — Dylan Perry

Nothing is more cheerful than talking about our friends' shortcomings. — Mason Cooley

Tonight's show is about doubt. Or maybe it isn't - haven't made my mind up yet. — Bill Bailey

I'm English. We're about as tactful as a hot poker up the bum, most of the time. — L.H. Thomson

The funny thing about having all this so-called success is that behind it is a certain horrible emptiness. — Sam Shepard

To me, I've never understood why there is any question about are women as funny as men. — Judd Apatow

It's funny about imagination, how it — Ivan Doig

Your name is a funny thing. It stands for what you're about, and everything I do is really about pride. — Tom Ford

Acting is all about big hair and funny props ... All the great actors knew it. Olivier knew it, Brando knew it. — Harold Ramis

That's the funny thing about knowing you can't have something. It makes you desperate. -Leah — Stephenie Meyer

The funny thing about memory is that it can't be fully trusted, and yet, in the end, it's the only truth we have. — Mindscape

I wrote an entire movie [Man up] about how important I think voices are, so it was funny. — Lake Bell

The funny thing about stopping is that as soon as you do it, here you are. — Jon Kabat-Zinn

CONFESSION NO. 18 Girls just want to have fun ... and live to tell about it the next day. — Ronda Thompson

Funny thing about the past. The older you get, the less it matters. — Jayne Ann Krentz

I don't know how high I went, I don't wanna know. Heights are not my favorite thing. It makes my balls go in my throat just thinking about it. — Chris Kyle

That's the funny thing about pity, Saint. It's condescending by default. — Wildbow

Now listen, guuuyyysss! Come on guys. Let's all, come on, let's be simple about this. — Robert Pattinson

The funny thing
about
advice is,
we always tell
others
the things
we
cannot
really do
ourselves. — Robert M. Drake

The guy behind the counter scratches his neck. "Are you being serious?" Her face is stoic. "Absolutely. I never kid about teddy bears. — Jessica Sorensen

There's a lot of guy comics who I think are funny, but I generally am more excited about a special or a show where there are females. — Margaret Cho

The funny thing about history is that we imagine that people didn't laugh in the old days, but of course they did, at stupid things. — Terry Jones

The thing about being a screenwriter, scriptwriter, scenarist, You get to have multiple personalities and not be charged. — Andrea L'Artiste

The thing I don't get about paedophilia ... Why the hell do kids find old men in dirty raincoats so sexy? — Frankie Boyle

I find his films about as funny as getting an arrow through the neck and discovering there's a gas bill tied to it. — Rowan Atkinson

Terribly sad news about Stuart Cable, such a lovely, warm, funny, talented man. — Rob Brydon

I don't know about Willie Davis. He's not as young as he used to be. — Jerry Coleman

Comedy is funny when it comes from truth, and that's always the rule of them. It's about how far you can push that boundary. — Ari Graynor

It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic. — Iliza Shlesinger

I had a dream about you last night ... you were a giant slinky and I watched you fall down the stairs. — Amy Summers

Alas! Charles made the promise glibly, and forgot all about it. — Whipplesnaith

I don't really have funny things to say about politics. I wish I did, but I don't. — Janeane Garofalo

Well, Clive, it's all about the two Ms - movement and positioning. — Ron Atkinson

I've never been bothered with my conduct. I've only been bothered by people that don't get it correct when they gossip about me. — Shannon L. Alder

No one's stopping you," said Jess. "But you've got to make it more interesting. That's why why we drift off and talk about biscuits. — Nick Hornby

The funny thing about writing is I think a lot of people assume that you're sitting in a garret with a quill pen for hour after hour. — Lincoln Child

You might want to put this in the back of your craw and think about it. — Jerry Coleman

It's funny how the smallest things I've done speak the loudest about me, but I like that. — Xavier Niel

About mistakes it's funny. You got to make your own; and not only that, if you try to keep people from making theirs they get mad. — Edna Ferber

Hollywood called me, asking me, "How much to do a movie with Farrah Fawcett?" "$50,000" They called back, "How about $20,000?" I said, "I'll pay it!" — Henny Youngman

The funny thing about me is I move from genre to genre, but I essentially shoot all the movies the same way. — James Mangold

So this bloke says to me, "Can I come in your house and talk about your carpets?" I thought "That's all I need, a Je-hoover's witness". — Tim Vine

I suspect that LaGuardia is an elaborate prank, and New York has a real airport nearby that only locals know about. — Dave Barry

I think people who are fanatical about anything are funny. — Jackie Schaffer

That's the only dog I know who can smell someone just thinking about food. — Charles M. Schulz

The funny thing about prayers is you can absolutely make up your own if you want to. — Art Hochberg

There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world. — Jean Baudrillard

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? — Jerry Seinfeld

I had a dream about you last night. We watched pornography together, but purely for the storyline. — Michael Summers

That's the exciting part about capitalism. It's like surfing, you have to catch the wave. - Martin Peter (aka Vermin Gobsmack) — Jamie Delano

People have many theories about comedy, but being just plain funny is the one most important thing. — Gilbert Gottfried

I am a guy who talks about bacon and escalators. — Jim Gaffigan

The funny thing about mundies is how obsessed with magic they are for a bunch of people who don't even know what the word means. — Cassandra Clare

The Bible talks about building houses on sand and rock, but says nothing about a brick house built on a blanket. — Nicole McKay

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.
It's really funny. — Brandon Sanderson

That's what acting is about, Funny wigs and voices, that's what we do. — Cillian Murphy

There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off. — Douglas Coupland

The funny thing is I'm not bothered or sad about being on my own - after all I've never had a husband. — Francesca Annis

The funny thing about facing imminent death is that it really snaps everything else into perspective. — James Patterson

Funny thing about true happiness, though. You never know it's inside you until someone pulls it out. — Meghan Quinn

Bragging about your compassion is the first step towards feeling a genuine emotion. — Bauvard

Funny thing about glass. When you broke the shit up, it got pissed and bit back. — J.R. Ward

The funny thing about an impossibility is that it tends to be a magnet for those who would prove it otherwise. — Richelle E. Goodrich

That's what I hate about a lot of comedies, when you're hitting a line or making it funny. — Jennifer Aniston

I would say I know nothing about the music business, in a nice sort of way. I totally forgot I was in that music video. That's so funny. — Zooey Deschanel

I had a funny feeling that day, all day: something about how much I liked my life and where I was with it. — John Darnielle

Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom. — Alan King

I'm writing a book about Siamese Twins that are attached at the nose. It's called: Stop Staring at Me! — Zach Galifianakis

while there's a lot that I don't know about the world, I do know that kids have a funny way of helping you keep things in perspective. — Nicholas Sparks

I keep forgetting about your amnesia. Heh. Forgetting about amnesia. That's funny. — Rick Riordan

A comedy isn't about being funny ... a comedy is about characters who dare to know that they may choose a happy ending after all. — Gary D. Schmidt